Banning kids
 

No, it smelled like onions, all right. But it was a small dab and it was in a place that was covered by underwear and clothes (i.e., my hip), so no one seemed to notice.

Not one of the cool kids.
 

Goddamn rock stars have THE LIFE. Enough money to piss down the drain. You're REQUIRED to do drugs. If not, you're not respected as a musician (see: Creed). You MUST destroy hotel rooms. You MUST sleep with 4 women at once EVERY NIGHT. You MUST develop a drinking problem. If you die early from being an idiot, you get MARTYRED a la Jim Morrison, who's legend far exceeds his talent.

When am I going to get THAT chance? That ONE chance, to pass out in my vomit. It's all I ask for.

Not one of the cool kids.
 

The "Free Bird" reference is priceless!

Even(and I needed that laugh today)Odds

Not one of the cool kids.
 

Can we agree that there is a gray area between tight ass/diligent researcher and drunken lech? I doubt many of us are truly either. I think potential clients look for people they like--not just people who can do the job.

Edited to say I really can't tell if you are joking on this one.

Banning babies
 

I'd probably like your husband. My sole reason for everything is dough. Nothing more, nothing less. I just like to eat at nice joints and blow cash on vacations. When people talk to me about deriving meaning from their career in law, they may as well talk to me about having a c-section. Just gimme me checks and leave me alone.

But amazingly, I lie like a son of a bitch when courting clients or talking to management, and I do it well. People think I'm really into what I do, which leads me to believe I missed my calling - acting.

I've got the lies so perfectly packaged and my personality so split down the middle that I am actually two separate people. I'llbe typing this one minute, then a partner will walk into my office, at which point I'll flip unconsciously and pretend to be engrossed in some "issue" that I couldn't give a flying fuck about. I monitor my realization like a hawk and act very studious (which is easy - all you have to do is shut your mouth, look determined and daydream) while talking to prosepective or current clients about cases. I do my work in short spurts and then lounge for lours at a time, often making calls to friends about hiring me to work in other fields or sending out resumes to various people and making follow ups.

All of this, every day for years, yet I still get raises and have been even held up a few times as a model employee.

S(life really is a fucking game, but its sooo damn silly... I feel like serial killer - I just want to get caught so I can get out)D

Banning babies
 

Of course they cannot have it all -- that's why I said "Life is a trade-off". I would go crazy staying home with the kids full time. I am 100% sure that I am a much better mom having a career. It's just that sometimes I would like to be at home hanging out with my kids -- whom I think are just great human beings -- and I feel wistful that I don't have the freedom to do it as much as I'd like.

That being said, my job is flexible enough (no law firm job for me, thank you very much...) I can take the afternoon off from time to time, it's no big deal, but when I do, I confess I feel a pang of guilt for not sitting at my desk. The men in my department take time off for family-related stuff too; it's a pretty accepted thing.

It may also interest you to know (or maybe not, but it may interest somebody) that when I speak to the former-career-gals who are now full-time, stay-at-home moms, they too are wistful about having given up their careers. The grass is always greener I guess.

Not one of the cool kids.
 

Jesus PLF take a day off from work will ya? I never, ever talk about anything too personal or explicit (at all) in a work-related situation, and would never get a buzz on in front of a client, but I don't think you have to have no sense of humor and be a complete tool to be a good lawyer. It's after work, or we're taking a ten-minute break; shut the hell up about the latest ERISA changes and tell me about your plans for your boat this summer. Or a book you've read. Or something that indicates you've got a goddamn soul, because frankly you are not going to find it imbedded in the U.S.C.A and I cannot do business with someone who has no life!

Edited to say that if you're joking, you're hired. Now fetch me some cocktail peanuts, boy.

I'm flattered. But as for the rest of your advice, jeez, wouldn't it just be simpler to hold somebody else's kid until it pukes on me and then hand it back? Your solutions all sound like work.

Not one of the cool kids.
 

Really? I've gotten good and drunk with clients on several occassions. Once got high with a client. I have not, however, taken hallucinigens with a client. Gotta draw the line somewhere.

CIA kept prank threat to Santa under 'secret' classification for 29 years

WASHINGTON (AFP) - The US Central Intelligence Agency classified as "secret" and withheld from public dissemination for nearly 29 years a prank terrorist threat against Santa Claus, according to documents released.

The threat -- purported to come from a then- and still-unknown group calling itself the "Group of the Martyr Ebenezer Scrooge" -- was contained in a classified compilation of intelligence on possible terrorist attacks produced by the CIA in late 1974, according to the documents.

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmp...e_030521170137

Not one of the cool kids.
 

Money for nothing and your chicks for free.

Not one of the cool kids.
 

Two points: (1) I hate it when I am not sure whether or not you are kidding, and (2) I kind of agreed with your post, which bothers me since you were probably kidding (and because SD won't like me now).

Bastard.

Not one of the cool kids.
 

Bobby,

I have no problem with tightasses who mind their own business. If you don't want to be the life the party, so be it. To each his own. However, don't scowl at or denigrate the guy who wants to have a good time. Life's short brother and this gig stinks - I'm just trying to grab the good times while I'm young and they're plenty. Should I be villified for that?

There's always money to be made - time's a bit more precious... no one remembers you for your professional ability when you die -they remember you for the times you made them laugh and your humanity.

S(again, this gig's just a way to pay for shit in real life)D

Whine & Cheese( the other white meat)
 

Damn! And here I was thinking that you wined me and dined me because of my metrosexual charms.

Penske (disallusioned) Account

Not one of the cool kids.
 

You don't need to be a rock star. I once started a fund to coerce an acquaintance into chugging a fifth of vodka. 27 righteous bucks (1988 dollars). For an extra 8 he followed it up with a third of a fifth of rum.

He passed out in his own vomit within 45 minutes.

Gives you something to shoot for.

I'll toss in $25 penske bucks for a live webcam performance.