border collies
 

This a good book about them.

http://lookinside-images.amazon.com/...gSYbL3ckJmUhc=

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

Well, in that case, you can be my pet.

TM

AI
 

Tonight is Billy Joel night. BJ won't actually be there, but everybody has to sing one of his songs.

How painful is this going to be?

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

Ugh. I'm far from being a big liberal, but when I get a dog I'm not going to consider going to any of those places. There are thousands of dogs at the LA Humane Society wanting for good owners. I think that should be a universal first choice.

On another thread, one of my cats is so smart he will play fetch with Q-tips, and when bored of that, he'll run the Q-tip over to a glass of water and dunk it to watch it expand. He's a little scientist or something. He also loves cantaloupe, lettuce, meat and cheese. The other one sleeps a lot, but he's about 17 years old, so let's cut him some slack.

AI
 

Clay has been waiting for this day his whole life.

Let's try to guess what he's going to sing. I'm thinking Piano Man, but New York State of Mind suits his voice too.

Thurgreed(who am i kidding, they all suit his syrupy bleh voice)Marshall

AI
 

Yes, it will suck -- imagine the horror of Josh doing "Uptown Girl" as a country song or "We Didn't Start the Fire" so he can channel Garth Brooks.

I am tempted to not watch because I am still pissed that Carmen is still there, and Rickey is not.

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

If you travel a lot and you live alone, it is a pain in the ass to arrange for someone to come over every 6-8 hours to let the dog out. If you have a cat you can spend a night or two away and not worry about it. Especially if you have a self cleaning liter box.

AI
 

Waaah! I must admit that it took some of the fun out of it for me, too. They were supposed to get rid of ALL the truly sucky before picking through all the good-singers-who-aren't-quite-Ruben.

I'll be interested to see the song choices, too. Will someone do "Always a Woman"? "Honesty"?

tm

AI
 

Actually, I heard he's going to sing that song whose name I can't remember but was the opening theme to Bosom Buddies.

Josh will sing "Shameless" b/c Garth has already covered it.

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

Or Sebastian.

TM

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

Yeah, I don't have a whipped husband unfortunately.

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

Wow that's a little harsh for those of us not in LA. I'd like to move to LA... (anyone know of great law jobs for two transactional types out there? no? thought not.)

So I guess I'll wait until I get to California to get a dog.

n(don't wanna piss str8 off)cs

AI
 

My Life

n(flashing back)cs

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

I adopted the OddCat from the local humane society seven years ago. She was there because she couldn't play well with others . . . because she is Siamese and they only like their own kind.

She's a source of constant entertainment. She plays with everything, especially paper and Qtips. (She opens the drawer to get them out.) She is trainable (she drinks out of her own glass) and she comes when called (unless she doesn't feel like it).

I highly recommend humane and rescue groups for adoption.

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

You have a cat that openly discriminates?! Does she wear a pointy hat like the one on PLF and go to TDT (Take Down Tabbies) meetings too? I need Steven Colbert to do an expose on these kitty Hitlers.

n(the sock puppet is appalled)cs

Regarding Labs
 

My sister's lab is an absolutely amazing retriever. He was bred to hunt ducks (apparently the breed has been so fucked up by over-breeding that a lot of labs are afraid of water), and he's good at it. There isn't a body of water in the world that he doesn't want to be in, and there isn't a thing in the world that he wouldn't like to put in his mouth. And he's a big guy, between 115 and 97 in his adulthood (he goes on diets every now and then).

He has chewed on probably 70 indivudal shoes, one cellphone, one antique quilt, three antique duck decoys, one rosebush, one wall, several books, countless rolls of toilet paper, several toothbrushes, a few hats, about six to ten dozen pairs of underwear, one set of keys, about a dozen pillows, countless stuffed animals, and a variety of other stuff that I don't know about.

He also spent his puppy-hood in one of the biggest party schools (according to Playboy in the relevant time periods) in the country, so he's fairly well socialized. He can hang out in bars like the best of them.

However, he's not the brightest dog in the pack. He's an alpha, but the other dogs can certainly trick him into doing things that he doesn't know how to react to.

AI
 

I just had a flashback to when Jennifer and Herb sang "Just the Way you Are" to each other on WKRP. Anyone else remember that. That song was also on my Carol Hensel Aerobics album (before the days of VCRs and exercise videos). God I feel old.

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

Be careful what you wish for. They have those phallic things you've been trying to avoid. In fact if you are unwilling to deal with that part, it is unlikely one would ever stay whipped for long.

n(psa)cs

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

The Displaced Dog is higher than 27.

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

You have to do the humane society route. The idea that certain animals would otherwise languish in cages or be destroyed almost dictates that you have to.

We lucked out with ours - we got a really rare breed of cat (I'd say but its possibly outable) from the shelter. He looke dlike any other sort of cat, until he started growing and became a really wild looking cat (long hair, thick fur between paws). We took him to the vet and they verified he was a very expensive breed. He turned out to be a runt, but fuck it - he still looks really cool.

The other one we adopted from a friend. She's just fat and stupid.

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

Yes, shelters and humane society's are the way to go. The critters are already screened for behavor and health problems, they are MUCH cheaper than a breeder, and you will be saving a life. Besides with a mixed breed you get a healthier animal. Take a look at an AKC pedigree, they are scary. Pure-breed AKC dogs tend to be bred for looks (conformation) alone. They compete in beauty contests. Yes they have Obedience and Agility trials but the money and prestige is in Conformation shows like Westminster.

My dog is a mutt but she does have her CGC.

AI
 

If someone promised me that anyone would do "Captain Jack," I'd actually tune in to see that shit. Or "Goodnight Saigon." That'd be hilarious. All the contestants could join in on the chorus. ". . . . and we would all go dowwwwn togetherrrrrrrrrrrrr . . . ."

A guy I knew in college was from an all-black neighborhood in Memphis. He'd never had even a single white friend until he got to college. His roommate, a real chalky engineering major from Jersey, took it upon himself to educate Rodney about white culture. Rodney's first lesson was to memorize "Piano Man." Arguably, it was all Rodney really needed to know to attain the functional literacy level.

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

Depends on the pedigree and the shelter. Sometimes they are not screened as well as they ought to be, and some breeders are better than others. You have to be careful either way. It is wonderful to rescue a mixed breed, I got both of my cats that way, but it all depends what you want. Either way, a shelter will be a lot cheaper than a breeder. Pure bred dogs range from a couple hundred bucks to thousands, depending on the breed and the reputation of the breeder. If you want a pure bred you can also try a rescue, but you have to be very careful about behavior problems with a rescue, they have often been abused.

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

Indeed. This would be why I don't have a whipped husband. And honestly, I find whipped women boring. I prefer a challenge. Unless you are talking about something kinky, in which case cool.

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

I think that apartment living in an urban setting pretty much mandates a cat over a dog (if you're going to have a pet at all). Ms. dL and I would probably love to have dogs but we live in an apartment and are both really busy, and I think that having a dog would be pretty fucking cruel.

FWIW, I too have shit box duty; Ms. dL does the laundry.

best quote of AI
 

Simon: ". . . if you can calm down the thing you do with your face . . ."

Bright Young Things, or Life on the FB
 

The Displaced Dog has a gummi bear experiment that he's been conducting for years. He LOVES gummi bears, and every now and then, he'll put one in his water bowl. Those suckers grow to about six or seven times their natural size when they're in water, and the Displaced Dog dutifully checks the waterbowl periodically to see how the progress is going.

BJ
 

Apropos of nothing, I would want Miami 2017

"They said that Queens could stay/ They blew the Bronx away/ And sank Manhattan out at sea"

noy7y(doing it all for Leyna)S

AI Review
 

No SEC_Chick review first, so here goes:

Kim Caldwell: She looks good. Sounds flat. As usual.

Ruben: His voice sounded a little rough -- like a sore throat. He's still the class of the competition. It's hard to believe he is in this competition to begin with and not already recording somewhere professionally.

Kim Locke: I don't feel her. The no rhythm thing offends my delicate sensibility. The hitting the wrong notes part offends the rest of the family. I am sure Thurgreed loved her rendition of New York State of Mind. She was fine and she looks much better.

Carmen: About her, Simon said it's like a kid standing up a party singing for her parents. She's awful.

Josh: Two different accents. Weird. Better than the past couple of weeks. Still pitch problems and tends to go flat at inopportune moments. He's staying of course. Semper fi.

Trenyce: She was good. I didn't like the song. She has a nice voice and a great sense of rhythm and phrasing. She's going home because people are stupid.

Clay: First of all, WTF with the ballad intro to the song and the "girrrrrrrrl" phrasing. He sings really well. He has a good voice and he has good rhythm and phrasing. But, I cannot stand his performances for some reason. Simon: "I prefer you when I shut my eyes . . . . if you can just calm down that thing you do with your face" is classic. All he needs is a really good producer and he'll be fine.

Overall, I liked Ruben and Trenyce the best, as usual. Kim C and Kim L were okay. Carmen and Josh were bad.

Bottom three: Kim C, Carmen, and Trenyce.

Trenyce goes home (because people are stupid).

Like Michael Mann dialogue?
 

Originally posted by taxwonk

Hopefully, neither of you like any talky dialogue he's written, especially for women. He's better at dialogue than Tarantino is at acting, but what director isn't?

Who is Anne Elk?
 

That or a new name for an irregular on the FB and a regular on a regional board.

AI Review
 

Kimberly Caldwell: Reminded me of someone you would see on Nickelodeon.

Ruben: He needs to rest his voice or something - while his pitch, phrasing and charisma were all there, there was a raspiness there that interrupted the flow a bit.

Kimberley Locke: She was ok, but not great. Too bad, I love that song, but she had none of the real longing and homesickness, that real passion for home, that the song calls for and makes you know just what Billy was talking about. Her voice is 'bluesy' because of her deeper range, not because of any soul or feeling that she emotes.

Carmen: Ugh. Polite applause, nearly no 'boos' at the judges being harsh. She is going home. Please.

Josh: Had to turn the tv down. He'll stick around, but that was not a great song for him at all.

Trenyce: Sounded fantastic, but needs to stop wearing the tops that look like she wore her bra on the outside.

Clay: He's adorable. But yeah, needs to stop the fluttereyes.

I think e/o is right on the Bottom 3, but I think that Carmen is going home. Then again, I've been saying that for the past 4 or 5 weeks, I think.

C(hope springs eternal)deuced

Billy Joel and a Big Music Sale
 

Not having seen AI, did someone sing "All for Leyna?" I loved that song as a kid. Glass Houses was the first album I ever owned. "All for Leyna" was never a single, but I listened to that song so much I damaged the tape. Billy Joel probably counts as a guilty pleasure for me. It's not like I listen to him regularly, and I only bought the one album, but he's got an enviable collection of pop songs.

In other music news...

In the spirit of the sale notices that Eagle Scout did on the Stalin Board, The Wherehouse Music chain is closing some stores because of bankruptcy, including their Sunset store (7217 West Sunset at La Brea). CD's and DVD's up to 70% off (everything in the store is at least half off). It's been picked through (i.e., no Beatles CD's), but there are still some deals to be had. Those mid-price CD's would be a steal at $5 or $6 new. The music selection was better than the DVD selection, but there were some porn DVD's, if you're into that kind of thing.

I got a recently released CD for $9 and an out-of-print obscure used CD for $4 that I was unable to find at a number of better record stores in LA. (Amoeba didn't even have it.)

Pete Yorn's new CD is OK. It's not as good as musicforthemorningafter, but the weaker cuts are pleasant enough for background music. He's very good live, so I'd choose seeing him in concert over buying the CD.

Lastly, 100th Window by Massive Attack will be the Make-Up Sex album of 2003. Mark my words.

AI review
 

Kim C.: Well, she went back to the type of song she feels comfortable with, which means more shouting. Her vibrato on the last note was pretty ovine. Simon hits the nail on the head with the "Six Flags" comment.

Ruben: Not his best night. Think he just had a frog that was causing the rasp, but it could be exacerbated by fatigue. Simon's right that he needs to branch out a little, but he still has the best voice and the best presence of the competition.

Kim L.: I don't know why you all don't seem to feel her. I thought she had the performance of the night tonight. Yeah, maybe she did miss on emotional interpretation, but musically she was spot on and she doesn't always sound the same. I also think she looked great, like she may be losing weight.

Carmen: This was just painful. I didn't think she could do anything worse than the Blondie number, but she proved me wrong. She had serious pitch problems for the entire song. And the makeup seems to be doing really awful things to her face--last week she had one huge zit on her right cheek, and tonight she must have had 10-12. She knows she doesn't deserve to be there any more.

Josh: Pitchy on the low sections, but better up top. Unfortunately it's so near the top of his range that there's only room for trying to stay up there and not for any, you know, interpretation. Last note: Raaaaaaaaaaeeeeeeeeeet kind of spoiled the whole thing.

Trenyce: Don't know why you all liked her tonight; I thought it was her second-weakest performance (after the country night). She had a lot of pitch problems, and her interpretation of the song lacked direction and arc. Very spotty performance, but I really liked her eyeshadow.

Clay: Cheesiest possible arrangement of that song (which, as a Motown tribute song, was cheesy to begin with). However, he sounded great on the up-tempo chorus, proving his versatility. EO's right, once a good producer gets his hands on him and banishes all the annoying mannerisms and vocal tics, he has a bright future. Needs to spend less time by the mansion pool, though, or else he'll turn into a giant freckle.

Bottom 3 should be: Kim C., Carmen & Josh. Bottom 3 will be: Kim C., Carmen & Trenyce. If Carmen doesn't go this week, it had better be Kim C.

My sil saw Rickey on the Today show, and his prediction for the final 3 is Ruben, Clay and Josh. Says Clay gets an amazing amount of fan mail, far more than any other contestant (though if the feelings of this crowd are any indication, it has probably dropped off considerably since the first few weeks).

tm

AI
 

It was bad all right. I was trying to guess what song the prancing balladeer would do and could not come up with a huge show tuney ballad. Leave it to him to change the godawful Tell Her about it to a ballad at the start. I can definitely see him putting out a record called Really Cheezy Songs as Interpreted by the Prancing Balladeer. And I would like to thank Simon to tell him to cut out the theatrics. Makes you want to bust out the fly swatter.

Kim C- I like this song and hated her cover. Dont know if its cuz the music (not the singing) itself sounded karaoke amdd canned - do they do this so as not to obscure the singing?- but she couldnt make up for that. By the second line of the song it became obvious to me she was gonzo.

Ruben- I hated the song he sang and he made it unhatable. But I loved him a little less this week. I think he is in a rut. Gotta agree with Simon that he needs to mix it up. Basically, Simon and I are sock puppets. We would make a wonderful couple.

Kim L- I thought she did a great job and did a nice interpretation on a classic. But I am having a hard time picking a third for the bottom three, and based on her lack of a mormom voting coalition, freedom fighter support network or gay man plus teenage girl from the midwest and south fan club, i suspect she is bottomthree by attrition. Perhaps if she went blond and got some fake tits she might stick around a little longer.

Josh- he is a no talent suck job who is passably attractive and somehow managed to go to Hollywood instead of iraq. He is in the Clay Free Pass Club.

Carmen- By the second line of her song (which I was not familiar with), I thought, this isnt terrible. Then it got really really terrible. I think I may be a better singer than her. But there seems to be a gaping hole in the Not A Girl Not Yet A Woman No Talent Idol position vacated by Britney Spears (whose movie I stared watching last might and it was worse than I could even imagine- turned it off at the Joan Jett karaoke number which seemed quite reminiscent of Carmen butchering a classic on AI, but I digress). She is firmly bottom two but I think she has a bigger voting coalition than the other bim, so the other bim goes.

trenyce- all around excellent job and nice interp on the song, a few bad notes but probably the best act last night given ruben's lasckluster performance and the all around suckitude of everyone else but kim locke.

clay-i hate that song, i hate his twittering face and cabaret expressions. If I shut my eyes, I could pretend I was in my leopard dress and rhinestone tiara anxioulsly awaiting my chance to see the great white tigers getting humiliated by Siefried and Roy as soon as this cheezy eighties cover boy got off the stage. Damn this guy for commanding the people most likely to vote obsessive-compulsively


bottom three- kim c, carmen and i guess kim locke. gone kim c

AI
 

Whoops! Guess one of your little teenage fan sites was wrongo. Perhaps they do better on Survivor?

In the excellent news department
 

Salon says that A Mighty Wind is supposed to be even better than both Guffman and Best in Show. I think I must see this movie tonight.

AI
 

Billy Joel...

In my deck of 55 playing cards of history's gretest monsters, he's probably a jack, between Bruce Springsteen (queen) and Bono (ten).

I have it on good authority that if we locate Hussein in an embassy or mosque, we plan to flush him out by playing a loop of "Scenes From an Italian Restauarant," "The Entertainer" and "The Ballad of Billy the Kid" at top volume.

S(a clear violation of the Geneva Convention)D

AI
 

Hell no. At least BJ can sing and play and his music reflected the times.

However, that guy from Rush who should be shot for ever singing outside the privacy of his shower is an abomination against God.

p(yeah, bring it on Rush fans)j

AI
 

I hope Puffy is an Ace on your list. He has perpetrated many crimes against humanity, not the least of which was encouraging Jennifer Lopez to record an album.