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-   -   This is the thread where the fringster comes back with teeth (http://www.lawtalkers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=840)

Replaced_Texan 09-02-2009 11:04 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 398232)
Apologies for changing the subject from blowjobs, but I need some help planning a quickie wedding.

What do I do to plan one? The only thing I've figured out is that a license is required -- that seems easy enough. I'm trying to find a place that will do a small (REALLY small) thing with the lowest possible fuss-factor. Time is of the essence.

I need a place that is far enough away from home so that no guests need be invited, but close enough that it can be driven to for a weekend (or a few days -- whatever).

What's my next move, man?
I really love http://offbeatbride.com but it may not be your cup of tea.

bold_n_brazen 09-02-2009 11:07 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 398253)
Yeah, but if it's at the house, we need to invite people. Family members live too nearby not to invite them.

The kids want to be flower girl, ring bearer, etc., so some kind of ceremony is required.

Restaurant is a good idea, but NYC is out because of the "must then invite family" problem.

I've sent off some emails to places with wedding planners at some of the hotels y'all have suggested (THANK YOU!!), so we'll see what they say!
I have a hard time imagining a wedding without at least a handful of family.

Fugee 09-02-2009 11:08 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 398253)
Yeah, but if it's at the house, we need to invite people. Family members live too nearby not to invite them.

The kids want to be flower girl, ring bearer, etc., so some kind of ceremony is required.

Restaurant is a good idea, but NYC is out because of the "must then invite family" problem.

I've sent off some emails to places with wedding planners at some of the hotels y'all have suggested (THANK YOU!!), so we'll see what they say!
Is there a reason you don't want family to attend other than that it would make it a big deal? Why not invite people to the house for a party/dinner/Labor Day picnic -- and then when they are there announce you're getting married?

Have food delivered. Casual flowers. Photographer.

Did you just call me Coltrane? 09-02-2009 11:10 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sidd Finch (Post 398256)
That's lovely. Congratulations. Can we get back to discussing anal and oral sex?
Nope. dtb fucking blew it. And not in the good way.

dtb 09-02-2009 11:15 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fugee (Post 398261)
Is there a reason you don't want family to attend other than that it would make it a big deal? Why not invite people to the house for a party/dinner/Labor Day picnic -- and then when they are there announce you're getting married?

Have food delivered. Casual flowers. Photographer.
Yeah - once you invite some, you have to invite a bunch, which then involves coordinating schedules, etc. I don't even want to have invitations. I'm in something of a time crunch.

In other news, aren't blowjobs the best?!? I salivate just thinking about it.

Greedy,Greedy,Greedy 09-02-2009 11:17 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 398239)
OH, snap. That's a good idea. There have to be more wedding planners per-capita there than in any other location in the northeast.

They do. If you need a priest in the area, Dad's available for the price of a few beers. Though he might make a pass at your maid of honor.

Certain cruise line boat captains and justices of the peace can make things happen very quickly. The dean at my law school was a justice of the peace living in Cambridge, and he had stories of kids knocking on his door in the middle of the night and having them all properly wed by the next day.

Do you know any judges who might preside? In Mass. you need the blood tests and that's about it. I have another friend who recently presided over another friend's wedding here in his capacity as the only MBA hanging out in a crowd of software engineers. (The crowd apparently views money with reverence - I think I should have gotten the gig as one of the only lawyers in the crowd). He got a special dispensation of some sort to preside - apparently we let amateurs do it here.

I just got back from a great wedding in an exotic local. But probably not what you're looking for - you know, fireworks over the Saronic Gulf and such.

Also, a lot of people throw together ceremonies at their colleges. My sister had ten family members attend her wedding, presided over by her college's chaplain in a small room at the school, with a little dinner afterwards at a place nearby. She was about 10 years out at the time, but it was easy and convenient.

dtb 09-02-2009 11:18 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 398264)
They do. If you need a priest in the area, Dad's available for the price of a few beers. Though he might make a pass at your maid of honor.
My maid of honor is six years old. Ew.

I doubt she's much into blowjobs yet.

Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) 09-02-2009 11:22 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 398252)
But MA is a 20-minute drive. VT is several hours away.
So is Provincetown. You can't apply in one town and get married in another.

Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) 09-02-2009 11:23 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 398265)
My maid of honor is six years old. Ew.

I doubt she's much into blowjobs yet.
Maybe she should wear the white dress.

Replaced_Texan 09-02-2009 11:23 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 398264)
Do you know any judges who might preside? In Mass. you need the blood tests and that's about it. I have another friend who recently presided over another friend's wedding here in his capacity as the only MBA hanging out in a crowd of software engineers. (The crowd apparently views money with reverence - I think I should have gotten the gig as one of the only lawyers in the crowd). He got a special dispensation of some sort to preside - apparently we let amateurs do it here.

I just got back from a great wedding in an exotic local. But probably not what you're looking for - you know, fireworks over the Saronic Gulf and such.
Amateurs can do it anywhere, thanks to the Universal Life Church. I've been an officiant at a wedding, and I have no other qualifications other than being a good friend of the bride and groom.

Greedy,Greedy,Greedy 09-02-2009 11:25 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by John Phoenix (Post 398249)
MA site: http://marriage.about.com/gi/dynamic...gl-207-toc.htm

Looks like MA requires a three day waiting period, too, but no more blood test, at least.
No more blood test? I should have held off getting married. I hate needles.

Greedy,Greedy,Greedy 09-02-2009 11:26 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 398265)
My maid of honor is six years old. Ew.

I doubt she's much into blowjobs yet.
Too young even for him.

notcasesensitive 09-02-2009 11:26 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by bold_n_brazen (Post 398259)
I have a hard time imagining a wedding without at least a handful of family.
well it's a good thing it isn't your wedding then.

greatwhitenorthchick 09-02-2009 11:27 AM
Ha
 
Look at "pronounced."

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/player...?playerId=4574

I realize that is how it is, in fact, pronounced -- it still makes me laugh.

Greedy,Greedy,Greedy 09-02-2009 11:27 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Replaced_Texan (Post 398268)
Amateurs can do it anywhere, thanks to the Universal Life Church. I've been an officiant at a wedding, and I have no other qualifications other than being a good friend of the bride and groom.
There you go, dtb. Get RT to fly up to preside.

Adder 09-02-2009 11:28 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 398263)
In other news, aren't blowjobs the best?!? I salivate just thinking about it.
Too little, too late. You have turned this into the wedding board, and I, for one, hate you for it.

bold_n_brazen 09-02-2009 11:30 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by notcasesensitive (Post 398271)
well it's a good thing it isn't your wedding then.
Truly.

Greedy,Greedy,Greedy 09-02-2009 11:30 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Adder (Post 398274)
Too little, too late. You have turned this into the wedding board, and I, for one, hate you for it.
Anyone want to talk about the joys of Preggo Sex?

dtb 09-02-2009 11:32 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) (Post 398266)
So is Provincetown. You can't apply in one town and get married in another.
Yes, you can.

http://www.cityofboston.gov/registry/marriage.asp (third paragraph, second sentence)

How do you make words appear instead of the URL?

More proof! (I figured it out, apparently.)

Adder 09-02-2009 11:32 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 398276)
Anyone want to talk about the joys of Preggo Sex?
Have at it, but I have nothing to add.

Hmm... somehow that seems familiar.

dtb 09-02-2009 11:35 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 398276)
Anyone want to talk about the joys of Preggo Sex?

How about preggo blowjobs? The protein is really good for the growing fetus!

Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) 09-02-2009 11:37 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 398277)
Yes, you can.

http://www.cityofboston.gov/registry/marriage.asp (third paragraph, second sentence)

How do you make words appear instead of the URL?

More proof!
First the blood tests and now that? They'll just let anyone get married in that state now.

Check it -- a loophole:
Quote:
If either of you are close to death, or if the bride is near the end of her pregnancy, a request by your attending physician or clergyperson would suffice and the clerk can issue the license immediately without a court order.
source

Greedy,Greedy,Greedy 09-02-2009 11:41 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 398277)
Yes, you can.

http://www.cityofboston.gov/registry/marriage.asp (third paragraph, second sentence)

How do you make words appear instead of the URL?

More proof! (I figured it out, apparently.)
Looks like you need $20 and two people with a pulse.

Greedy,Greedy,Greedy 09-02-2009 11:43 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 398279)
How about preggo blowjobs? The protein is really good for the growing fetus!
Nothing more beautiful than a pregnant woman with a glow who buys that line.

Fugee 09-02-2009 11:43 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by bold_n_brazen (Post 398259)
I have a hard time imagining a wedding without at least a handful of family.
2. But as ncs pointed out, it's a good thing it isn't my wedding or yours.

Speaking of weddings, was the brazenette a darling flower girl?

Did you just call me Coltrane? 09-02-2009 11:45 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 398276)
Anyone want to talk about the joys of Preggo Sex?
No. It'll remind me that I don't get it very often (due in Oct).

Adder 09-02-2009 11:46 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fugee (Post 398283)
Speaking of weddings, was the brazenette a darling flower girl?
See, dtb, see what you have started??!!

John Phoenix 09-02-2009 11:47 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 398281)
It looks like you have to apply in person, but do you have to pick up the license in person?

Greedy,Greedy,Greedy 09-02-2009 11:49 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Did you just call me Coltrane? (Post 398284)
No. It'll remind me that I don't get it very often (due in Oct).
This is so confusing. I want to say congratulations, but somehow it doesn't seem appropriate any more.

dtb 09-02-2009 11:50 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Did you just call me Coltrane? (Post 398284)
No. It'll remind me that I don't get it very often (due in Oct).
But she probably couldn't get enough (sex or blowjob-giving) for the first six months or so, right? RIGHT?

Fugee 09-02-2009 11:58 AM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 398288)
But she probably couldn't get enough (sex or blowjob-giving) for the first six months or so, right? RIGHT?
You're assuming she got it from Coltrane.

Flinty_McFlint 09-02-2009 12:19 PM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 398279)
How about preggo blowjobs? The protein is really good for the growing fetus!
Ok, you really need to stop posting now. e/o giveth, and dtb taketh away. Though it sounds like e/o geteth as well as giveth.

ltl/fb 09-02-2009 12:25 PM
Re: This is the thread where the fringster comes back with teeth
 
I will be getting a plastic temporary tooth soon. Then maybe a crown.

Hank Chinaski 09-02-2009 12:27 PM
Re: This is the thread where the fringster comes back with teeth
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ltl/fb (Post 398291)
I will be getting a plastic temporary tooth soon. Then maybe a crown.
just for the record, my thread title was picked in ignorance of your dentistry appointments. I simply predicted that you would be getting mean at some point in these 5000 posts.

Tyrone Slothrop 09-02-2009 12:27 PM
Re: Wedding Planning
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 398252)
But MA is a 20-minute drive. VT is several hours away.
When you said a quickie wedding, you weren't kidding.

(Congrats!)

ThurgreedMarshall 09-02-2009 12:29 PM
Re: This is the thread where the fringster comes back with teeth
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ltl/fb (Post 398291)
I will be getting a plastic temporary tooth soon. Then maybe a crown.
You should ask for a tiara instead.

TM

evenodds 09-02-2009 12:30 PM
What happened to the blow jobs and the buttsex?
 
Sheesh, I leave for a few hours and we turn into the motherfucking Knot.com?

Preggo blow jobs? The reason to give blow jobs is to not get pregnant. (See also: anal.)

My current guy, who I've been dating for nearly a year and is therefore the luckiest man alive, returned yesterday after two weeks away, so I had an opportunity for more exploration into the oral arts. Though it's something we really love, it's just an aperitif.

A note: this was our first chance to break in my new ridiculous tempur-pedic mattress. Amazing for sleeping, not so great for sexing (for us), although it would definitely help those of you with wrist or shoulder related problems.

Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) 09-02-2009 12:33 PM
Re: What happened to the blow jobs and the buttsex?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by evenodds (Post 398295)
Amazing for sleeping, not so great for sexing (for us)
It was developed by NASA after all.

Hank Chinaski 09-02-2009 12:33 PM
Re: What happened to the blow jobs and the buttsex?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by evenodds (Post 398295)
A note: this was our first chance to break in my new ridiculous tempur-pedic mattress. Amazing for sleeping, not so great for sexing (for us),
vertical resistance is why you can put your wine glass on a temper-pedic and jump around. does he do push-ups? I mean it's "horizontal bop" not "vertical."

Sidd Finch 09-02-2009 12:34 PM
Re: What happened to the blow jobs and the buttsex?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by evenodds (Post 398295)
My current guy, who I've been dating for nearly a year and is therefore the luckiest man alive, returned yesterday after two weeks away, so I had an opportunity for more exploration into the oral arts. Though it's something we really love, it's just an aperitif.
So now you do swallow?


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