Gossip Folks
 

That question better be rhetorical.

TM

Bilmore
 

If Charlton Heston can win the Charlton Heston award, Bilmore should be able to win the Bilmore.

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmp.../people_heston

Fucking telemarketers
 

I would happily do the laundry with you, just so we could chat a bit while folding. I'd love to talk about your tribe if you'll just talk a bit about mine.

And now that you've changed your signature do I have to change my profile? I so thought you were calling me!

Fucking telemarketers
 

Is it enough if I concede I love to buy and eat the angel-shaped cookies the ladies at the church down the street from me make for their Christmas fair?

See, I even tithe.

Alanis Likes Brazilians
 

10,000 spoons.

Fucking telemarketers
 

So, you bring the cookies, I'll bring the bagels, we'll talk. It's what I do.

Fucking telemarketers
 

Next time, tell them you're really interested in that carpet shampooing feature. They'll shampoo your carpet. Well, one room at least.

Fucking telemarketers
 

That's the second time in less than 20 minutes that someone has used the word "tithe" in conversation with me. WTF is that all about?

You can be the President; I'd rather be the Pope.
 

Geez, fringey. I know you hate New York and all, but it does have a pretty good museum or two. If you ever visit, you could check it out -- and see the lovely painting Atticus so kindly posted for you in the flesh! I don't the guards and stuff like you to touch the paintings though, so you'd have to admire it (or deride it, as the case may be) from amiddistance (I made that word up).

Edited to say: OK, OK, so it's not in New York. I've heard Paris is nice too -- if it weren't for all those damned Parisians...

So I can't remember where I've seen the damned thing -- so sue me!!! (uh, that's just a rhetorical flourish)

It is quite an impressive painting, I must say. Even if it lives in a city full of Parisians.

The only salespeople I get to my home are the annoying magazine kids.

Alanis Likes Brazilians
 

I like the schtick, Shape Shifter. That and the whole reptilian/world domination thing work for you... But,

I think even Alanis would want to kick your ass after that one...

(Of course, she looks like she wants to kick EVERYONE'S ass...)

We are all next on Paigow's Ignore List
 

When you are beyond reproach, people assume you have religious interests.

Desparately seeking.....
 

Does he have fountain pens? I've gotten a few guys, including the Mr., addicted to fountain pens. It's old fashioned, so it appeals to romantics, and a mechanical gizmo, so it appeals to techie-fixit guys. You can get them monogrammed. Hey, he may even use it to write, or at least sign checks.

I'm particularly fond of Montblancs and Parkers, but Scheaffers are quite reliable and have a wider price range. I find watermans and crosses scratchy. I have no real opinion on Pelikans

My favorites are the kids selling M&M's out of the cases that you can get at Sam's...

They tell you they're selling them for the "team", but when you ask them what the "team" is, they can't even tell you what sport they supposedly play...

I give them an A in capitalism, but you need to get your story straight first...

Bilmore
 

Why is the Flower saving all of his Prettiness for IM and PM? Can't we get a Little love on the Board?

We are all next on Paigow's Ignore List
 

Actually, I was thinking of that old "Bloom County" where Opus & Milo are listening to an Ozzy record backwards for its demonic hidden lyrics, which end up being "GooOOO to CHuuuRRCH! SAAAAAyyy YYoouur praaaaayyyers! Tithe, tiiiittthhhe!"

Desperately seeking.....
 

I forget that people still do this, but sometimes am reminded, to my utter astonishment, while in the express lane at the grocery store.

What's grosser than gross?
 

OTOH, she's got to be happy that she's going to live.

Bilmore
 

Intellectual property issues.

I'm not allowed to say any more than that.

Bilmore
 

He's run out?

Desparately seeking.....
 

Okay. Your spouse has lived through 100% of his birthdays to date.

Thurgreed(what do I win?)Marshall

Gossip Folks
 

I've tried selling them on the benefits of the American Church of Satan, expounding on the philosophies of Anton LeVay. That works pretty well, too, and if you had to read Byron's Manifred in college you can even get the gist of it right (Crowley's harder).

Perhaps not surprisingly, I've found that claiming devout Roman Catholicism scares them away about as fast as Satanism and witchcraft. Many evangelical proddies don't seem to see much of a difference.

Desparately seeking.....
 

Not a bad idea. I've also heard mention of little ones, and one suggestion can be photographic equipment. Men, cameras and kids are a good combination, and there is a never ending supply of add-on gadgets and extras if you get him hooked on a 35 mm (solving this problem for once and for all). If he prefers home videos, good video editing software is pretty expensive, and video cams also have lots of add-ons. Also, techie gadgets proliferate, and so of the good au currant ones include mp3 players and ceiva players.

Desparately seeking.....
 

What's that? And can it play "Copacabana" or "The Pina Colada Song"?

Bilmore
 

He was trying to sway the jury of me on the award. it was all very hush hush.

and of course the whole point of my post was a gratuitious, see how cool I am, the flower writes me! it would have been better if I could have said, Flower, my lover, imed me.

but get IM, rp and we can have a conference!!! we can invite my beloved pushy who is too scarce these days. i will bring the sandwiches, you bring the sodas!

Desparately seeking.....
 

Geez, don't make an admission like this publicly! You can be traced in spite of your anon name, you know.

(Edited to add, out of an abundance of caution, that this post in no way implies that I condone . . . well . . . anything . Yeah, that's it. I don't condone anything. Nuthin'.)

Desparately seeking.....
 

Plays digital photos. http://www.ceiva.com/

They sell them on the train here - "to help stop drug abuse" however, they have no literature and are affiliated with no apparent "organization."

Well, do they look high? Maybe it's working.

Desparately seeking.....
 

They are frames that plug into a telephone socket and download photos off an internet site, so you can have one frame with a neverending slide show of a whole bunch of your photos. Good for offices and for relations, since it means you can just email a photo to someone's desk frame.

As you can tell from Bilmore's post, he keeps one hooked up to one of those websites recommended by a Roman Catholic Priest. (Edited to add: Bilmore is having a very bad day. On the politics board, he admitted to drug use and called one of the members of Bush's cabinet Satan. Now this.)

Desparately seeking.....
 

A pained groan and a piece of cake if you can make it down here by Monday. I'm not buying you a present too, however.

-TL

Gossip Folks
 

This is my schtick. Turns out, most door-to-door evangelicals turn off the hard sell when they're told you attend a "competing" church of any kind --- as long as it's Christian. They'll still want to talk, but there's less to talk about, and less likelihood they'll save a soul.

Honest to God true story: a pair of JWs knocked on my parents' door some time when I was visiting. My dad starts jonesing for "Jesus Christ Superstar" on Ash Wednesday, and he had it on, this being in late Lent. I opened the door as "This Jesus Must Die" was coming on, and the chorus hit as the were gaining momentum in their schpiel. I smirked, they blanched. They just sort of wandered away. I thought about calling after them, but I couldn't think of anything to say that would have made the effect more perfect. "They listen to music about killing Jesus." {Solemn nod.}

Desparately seeking.....
 

That would be a far more attractive product if it could be done completely through the internet (e.g., hooked up to a computer with a cable modem/dls) without a monthly fee.

Gossip Folks
 

There is one?

Desparately seeking.....
 

AHA!!!! Digital camera. Was I not just complaining recently we didn't have one? Anyone have any suggestions as to buying one of these thingies for the technologically challenged?

-TL

Desparately seeking.....
 

If you look on the software newsserver sites, there are programs out there that let you do this with these. You hook it through your computer, and your senders have to have the same program.

Desparately seeking.....
 

In other words, you want to pay money for a screensaver?

The ceiva is particularly useful for the technologically inept relative.

(Note that I receive no commissions on sales of this product.)

Child labor
 

No, most of them are just slightly too young to do drugs just yet. However, there is usually a pimp guy who's watching (probably to see if they just eat the candy) kind of like that movie "Like Mike."
Except there's no orphanage involved.

Desparately seeking.....
 

Hmmm. I've seen pictures of Rupert Holmes, and I'm sure I wouldn't want to download 'em. But might be nice for family photos and stuff.

Desparately seeking.....
 

Reviews of digital cameras