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The Future is All Chin.

Re: Demon rummies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pretty Little Flower (Post 375856)

No worries, old chap. By my calculations, if you keep strong and keep at it, you'll finish with 9 hours til the Oh to the 9. Plenty of time to get down with the get down, if you know what I mean and I think that you do.

Up in the VIP, pop champagne, yes? Corner office endourses Salon, Delamotte if I am proling it, but the latter ain't how I rollin' in the Oh-9! Boo to the Yah!

Re: The Future is All Chin.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gattigap (Post 375874)

Montgomery Burns explains why Jay Leno will destroy NBC's prime-time schedule.

I didnt' read the article, but does it say because he sucks and isn't funny?

Re: The Future is All Chin.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Penske_Account (Post 375876)

I didnt' read the article, but does it say because he sucks and isn't funny?

he was really funny pre-tonight show, but 2 now.

the guy has fallen from one of the funniest around to useless. he's fallen like twice that flower sock.

Re: Demon rummies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gattigap (Post 375824)

Oh, no. I guess you hadn't heard - Sidd designed the Breakfast Fizz currently being served at the Clock Bar.

This is going to be so awkward.

Not guilty. However, I did attend the opening of the Clock Bar (received an invitation from a client). There was a six-foot tall stunningly gorgeous blonde waitress. If necessary, I will kill Atticus to protect her.

Re: Demon rummies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sidd Finch (Post 375899)

Was her name Erin?

Re: Demon rummies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by LessinSF (Post 375922)

Was her name Erin?

I've either forgotten, or our relationship didn't progress to that point. Mrs. Finch's presence may have been an obstacle.

Re: Demon rummies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sidd Finch (Post 375937)

I've either forgotten, or our relationship didn't progress to that point. Mrs. Finch's presence may have been an obstacle.

A true player would have incorporated her into the game. Just sayin.

Re: Demon rummies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flinty_McFlint (Post 375938)

A true player would have incorporated her into the game. Just sayin.

Where do you get that? I'm assuming Mrs. Finch is into three-ways, so long as they're anonymous.

Re: Demon rummies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flinty_McFlint (Post 375938)

A true player would have incorporated her into the game. Just sayin.

translation: my "foreplay" involves cell phone pictures I've taken looking up ladies' skirts.

Re: Demon rummies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski (Post 375944)

translation: my "foreplay" involves cell phone pictures I've taken looking up ladies' skirts.

With other posters, I'd chide them for such a lazy, uninspired insult, but with you, I'll just say "good job Hank, funny."

Re: Demon rummies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flinty_McFlint (Post 375938)

A true player would have incorporated her into the game. Just sayin.

Like you'd know a true player if your wife let you out to see one.

Re: Demon rummies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flinty_McFlint (Post 375948)

With other posters, I'd chide them for such a lazy, uninspired insult, but with you, I'll just say "good job Hank, funny."

thanks.

Re: Demon rummies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) (Post 375941)

Where do you get that? I'm assuming Mrs. Finch is into three-ways, so long as they're anonymous.

The anonymous thing is always the slippery slope, npi.

Re: Demon rummies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) (Post 375941)

Where do you get that? I'm assuming Mrs. Finch is into three-ways, so long as they're anonymous.

Maybe at one time. But lately, every time another person gets into her fun parts, we end up having to take it home and change its diapers for a few years.

Re: Demon rummies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sidd Finch (Post 375961)

Maybe at one time. But lately, every time another person gets into her fun parts, we end up having to take it home and change its diapers for a few years.

Tell her to quit picking up guys at the VFW hall.

Re: Demon rummies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atticus Grinch (Post 375822)

It must be true that alcohol precipitates violence, because I want desperately to punch absolutely everyone who had anything to do with this article. Including all of the people in the slideshow.

From this weeks tablehopper.com, a weekly food and beverage e-mail newsletter about the Bay Area scene I recommend to anyone who wants to subscribe - http://www.tablehopper.com/lets_talk/subscribe.html .

Quote:

Every year I do a roundup of ten things I don’t want to see on restaurant menus or in bars anymore. Yeah, it’s time for the tablehopper to cop some ‘tude, arch an eyebrow, and be a little fussy. Hey, you try eating out and drinking five nights a week, and you’d have some things to say, too. Let’s dive in.

No Thanks, I’m Fine: No More in ’09

1. I am so blowing the whistle on cupcakes. Yes, it’s great to have a few shops in each city, but we don’t need more than a few. And really, what is up with the LINES of people (mostly ladies) waiting at some of these places? Ri-donkedonk. Now, I would queue up for a true Parisian croissant… but unless those sprinkles on said cupcakes start coming from happy pills, the frosting on my cupcake is of an unhappy face.

2. Since we’re on dessert, what is up with all the salt ending up in my sweets? Salted caramels, lovely. Salted caramel ice cream from Bi-Rite, bring it. But when I start crunching on large flakes of salt in my chocolate dessert and suddenly need to order more water, I gotta draw the line. Please keep the monster flakes o’ Maldon away from my Madagascar chocolate.

3. You didn’t think I was going to skip fro-yo, did you? Hells no. See, it’s the exact same cycle that happened back in the 80s: too many yogurt shops open at once, the city gets flooded with fro-yo, and then suddenly every place closes shop and we end up with none. It’s a runaway train of fruit-named knockoffs breeding like rabbits. And hilariously, the City doesn't even have a Pinkberry, the mother ship of them all.

4. Ahem on mixology mayhem. Now, I love my cocktails as much as the next boozehound. And we’re blessed to have so many pros in San Francisco who can make a spectacular cocktail—I dig the “kitchen notes” in a lot of drinks that make them pair well with food, or help my cocktail do double duty as an appetizer, heh. But more and more I find myself glazing over when my drink starts to sound like something I should be eating in a haute French restaurant, with a detailed description of each and every ingredient and the techniques used to make the darned thing. Can we dial this back to five, or six? (The hype, and the minutes it takes to make it.) Let’s get back to having the folks behind the stick be bartenders first, mixologists second. Which is why I am finding myself back on Manhattans. They’re quick, because yo, I’m thirsty. And it better not cost $14.

5. I know I’m gonna get some heat on this one, but the cocktail consulting thing at local restos also needs some reining in. A good cocktail list does not a good restaurant make. Yeah, the cocktail program reads great on the restaurant’s press release, and it’s all dandy during the opening when the startenders are there, but what is going on with those drinks a month or two later? That quality control thing is tricky. I’d prefer simpler drinks (see above), less fanfare.

6. This one is a cautionary tale: bacon. I totally dug the pigwich at Orson, and the bacon with apple and maple donut from Dynamo was an item whose time had come. But folks experimenting with bacon better stop acting all OCG (Original Culinary Gangster) because look around, everyone is doing it. Bacon is totally jumping the shark.

7. Ditto on poached eggs. Breakfast, it’s what’s for dinner! Not. I eat far too many eggs every week; they’re definitely going with me to the desert island. But man, can we take it (over) easy? Eggs are making appearances on dinner menus everywhere. Unless the chef is doing something really unique, like Seis Kamimura at Postrio, who is soft-cooking an egg inside a Wolfe Ranch quail, wrapping that puppy in San Daniele prosciutto, then deep frying it, and glazing the quail with a maple Banyuls vinegar gastrique—otherwise, can we just leave the poached eggs to the brunch places, truffle season, pizzas, and bistros serving salade Lyonnaise?

8. Large plates, but small tables, and even smaller portions. ‘Nuff said.

9. Communal tables, especially the big ones that are so wide you can’t hear your friend sitting across from you, especially with all the other people around talkin’ loudly. So much for communal. Yes, they are a clever way to seat single diners or a random group of folks who don’t have reservations, but find me anyone out there who brightens up when the reservationist says, “No, we don’t have any tables available that night, but we do have first-come, first-served spots at our communal table!”

10. Did I just hear that woman at the table next to me ask if the salad was local? Yeah lady, the menu says it’s from County Line Harvest, relax. The intense local / sustainable / organic policing that is happening at restaurant tables is making my head hurt. It’s like the Inquisition! These are fine questions to ask of your salmon, your beef, and your tomatoes during that pesky scare, but what’s coming under the microscope next, the garnish in your drink, and the chocolate shavings on your dessert? Why even eat out?

Another reason I don't FaceBook

Re: Demon rummies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sidd Finch (Post 375961)

Maybe at one time. But lately, every time another person gets into her fun parts, we end up having to take it home and change its diapers for a few years.

I am thinking of getting geriatric canine diapers for my almost 13 yo dog, thoughts?

Re: Another reason I don't FaceBook

Quote:

Originally Posted by Penske_Account (Post 375980)

Who exactly complained about the breastfeeding photos on Facebook? ........

Obviously the complainers don't have firsthand experience of breastfeeding. Once you've done it or been around it, you know it's.......about ......"mmm-mmm, boobies".

[link is to the London Times On line's blogs-pic of a breastfeeding baby is on the page, sfw or not at your own discretion]

What asswipe is going to complain about bare teat in public? Just move the kid's yap out of the way a few times to give us geezers a thrill.

I scream, you scream, we all scream for her.

Tonight I had some cherry pie that did not taste so good to make me cry. Maybe it's because I am an immature boy stuck in a grown man's body instead of an actual grown man. Or maybe the pie really wasn't that much of a sweet surprise.

The lyrics to that song, as Maude Lebowski would say, are ludicrous.

Swingin' in the living room,
Swingin' in the kitchen.
Most folks don't cause,
They're too busy bitchin'.
Swingin' in there cause,
She wanted me to feed her.
So I mixed up the batter,
And she licked the beater.

What?

Outstanding.

Funniest Movies of the Past 25 Years

According to EW:

25. WITHNAIL AND I (1987)
24. THE NAKED GUN: FROM THE FILES OF POLICE SQUAD (1988)
23. AUSTIN POWERS: INTERNATIONAL MAN OF MYSTERY (1997)
22. OLD SCHOOL (2003)
21. CLERKS (1994)
20. BEST IN SHOW (2000)
19. CLUELESS (1995)
18. NAPOLEON DYNAMITE (2004)
17. TROPIC THUNDER (2008)
16. SUPERBAD (2007)
15. TRADING PLACES (1983)
14. WEDDING CRASHERS (2005)
13. WAITING FOR GUFFMAN (1996)
12. WHEN HARRY MET SALLY... (1989)
11. THE 40 YEAR-OLD VIRGIN (2005)
10. DAZED AND CONFUSED (1993)
9. A FISH CALLED WANDA (1988)
8. THE BIG LEBOWSKI (1998)
7. THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT MARY (1998)
6. SOUTH PARK: BIGGER LONGER & UNCUT (1999)
5. OFFICE SPACE (1999)
4. THIS IS SPINAL TAP (1984)
3. BEVERLY HILLS COP (1984)
2. NATIONAL LAMPOON'S VACATION (1983)
1. GHOSTBUSTERS (1984)

Take out the following:

Clueless
40 Year Old Virgin (barely laughed)
Wedding Crashers (funny for 15 minutes)
South Park (was funny when it came out, but not really that funny anymore)

Some of these were funny at the time, but aren't quite as funny anymore:

There's Something about Mary (FRANKS AND BEANS!)
Austin Powers (I have to admit, I enjoyed it when I first saw it)

These movies need to be on the list:

The Royal Tennenbaums
Bottle Rocket
Rushmore
Raising Arizona
The Princess Bride
Revenge of the Nerds

My top five would be:

(1) The Big Lebowski
(2) Office Space
(3) Trading Places
(4) Rushmore
(5) The Royal Tennenbaums

Re: Funniest Movies of the Past 25 Years

Quote:

Originally Posted by Did you just call me Coltrane? (Post 376022)

couple of thouhgts:

1 after tonight you'll have to replace Trading Places. what goes in?
2 Harry Met sally is a comedy? Really?
3 All the mindless SNL drivel on there can stay, but doesn't clerks and napoleon need to be about it.
4 Fargo is funnier than about 10 of these. Of course the laughs are at the expense of minnesotians, but fuck them.
5 Ghostbuster and NLV are not funnier than TBL.
6 why won't you friend me?

Re: Funniest Movies of the Past 25 Years

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski (Post 376023)

1 after tonight you'll have to replace Trading Places.

[keanu]Whoa![/keanu]

More reason to hate NYE.*

*Another is that preparations in times square are a "developing story" per CNN.**

** Maybe that's more a reason to hate CNN.com.

I was in Africa for the past week or so and I can report conclusively on a few things:

1. The only water flowing there is NOT the bitter sting of tears. There are some lakes, rivers, etc.

2. There IS snow in Africa at Christmastime. I saw some.

3. The Christmas bells that ring there are NOT the clanging chimes of doom.

I have the feeling that the members of Band-Aid were not as informed as I presumed them to be at the time.

In other news, Santa is black and quite handsome and, as far I could tell, everyone in Kenya voted for Obama.

Happy New Year, everyone!

Re: Feed the World

Quote:

Originally Posted by greatwhitenorthchick (Post 376027)

...I have the feeling that the members of Band-Aid were not as informed as I presumed them to be at the time.

Penis goes where?

Re: Feed the World

Quote:

Originally Posted by greatwhitenorthchick (Post 376027)

I was in Africa for the past week or so and I can report conclusively on a few things:

Did you give them a gift that is greater than life?

Re: Feed the World

Quote:

Originally Posted by greatwhitenorthchick (Post 376027)

I note that you did not report on whether they knew it was Christmastime at all.

Re: Funniest Movies of the Past 25 Years

Quote:

Originally Posted by Did you just call me Coltrane? (Post 376022)

Was the vote limited to adolescents?

Even though their best stuff was earlier, both Monty and Woody deserve to have an entre on that list. Crimes and Misdemeanors would be my choice for Woody; the Meaning of Life is 25 this year (ok, for a few more hours). How about some other non-US stuff? Amelie, The Big Monty, Local Hero? All funnier than half the list.

Princess Bride has to be in the top 5. How about "I Married An Axe Murderer" - Mike Myers's funniest by far.

And thanks for friending me.

Re: A Fairy Tale of FB (serious Wonkage)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski (Post 375477)

i'm not old school. did you two have a thing?

Heavens, no. Less has never been that desperate!* (Not to mention that I don't do casual sex, being wingnut and all.)

As NB said, it's just unrequited love on the internet.

*He did kiss me once to keep me from having to kiss Paigow, for which I remain truly grateful.

Re: Funniest Movies of the Past 25 Years

Quote:

Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 376036)

by that logic you should add "Dracula Dead and Loving It."

no lifetime achievement awards.

Re: Funniest Movies of the Past 25 Years

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski (Post 376023)

I don't friend people. I have to be friended.

Re: Funniest Movies of the Past 25 Years

Quote:

Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 376036)

2 on So I Married an Axe Murderer. -2 for including fancy euro movies.

Re: Funniest Movies of the Past 25 Years

Quote:

Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 376036)

Princess Bride has to be in the top 5. How about "I Married An Axe Murderer" - Mike Myers's funniest by far.

You accuse the list of being tailored to adolescents and then suggest "Axe Murderer"? That movie stunk like ass. A beat poet in 1993 would either starve or be clubbed to death, preferably both. Even Phil Hartman couldn't save it.

What's amazing to me is not that Trading Places is 25 years old, but that Eddie Murphy is now 25 years older than he was when he made Trading Places and 48 Hrs. Leave aside that he hasn't made a funny live action movie in 15 of those years, the man doesn't age.

BTW, Princess Bride is a great movie, but "funny" would only be the fourth or fifth adjective I would use to describe it. If you're making a list of comedies it wouldn't qualify on technical grounds, so its absence from this list is forgivable.

Re: Funniest Movies of the Past 25 Years

Quote:

Originally Posted by Did you just call me Coltrane? (Post 376041)

I don't friend people. I have to be friended.

I'm sure. you think I'd give you the chance to deny my request? I'm Hank fucking Chinaski. A man like me cannot be made to look stupid.

Re: Funniest Movies of the Past 25 Years

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski (Post 376050)

I'm sure. you think I'd give you the chance to deny my request? I'm Hank fucking Chinaski. A man like me cannot be made to look stupid.

My New Year's resolution is not to read any posts about Facebook politics. TIA for your cooperation in helping me to reach my goal!

Re: Funniest Movies of the Past 25 Years

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atticus Grinch (Post 376043)

Fine. We'll add Canadian Bacon. Are you satisfied now?

Re: Funniest Movies of the Past 25 Years

Quote:

Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 376053)

Fine. We'll add Canadian Bacon. Are you satisfied now?

My other resolution is to bookmark all the posts that will make Fringey smile to read when she returns.

This does not make the list, despite your desperate and borderline blasphemous allusion to bacon.

Sex, sex, sex, sex, sex... now, where were we?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski (Post 376039)

by that logic you should add "Dracula Dead and Loving It."

no lifetime achievement awards.

So you didn't get "The Meaning of Life"?

Re: Funniest Movies of the Past 25 Years

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atticus Grinch (Post 376052)

My New Year's resolution is not to read any posts about Facebook politics. TIA for your cooperation in helping me to reach my goal!

sorry. it was a fresh wound. i cut easily but I callous quickly. I will honor your request.