Do Lawtalkers Dream of Electric Sheep?

[dtb]

Originally posted by Tyrone Slothrop
No male partner would ever do such a thing.

Thank you, Ty. (For being a boy who recognizes this pernicious and pervasive tendency!)

[Replaced_Texan]

My new favorite headline of all time (formerly, "Man, woman, serpent die in firey collision")

Twin gay-porn stars arrested in rooftop burglaries.

It's even better:

Twins Keyontyli and Taleon Goffney have been arrested for allegedly breaking into area businesses by cutting rooftop holes to gain entry. Turns out, they were also just as skilled at breaking into their second, more respectable careers—as hardcore gay-porn stars.

. . .

"Taleon is a bad, bad dude," one police source said. Chief Dave Kunkel of Clementon, NJ, had no trouble recalling his department's run-in with Taleon in 2006.

Officers conducting surveillance work at an apartment complex spotted Taleon running up the building's walls and turning back flips.

"The officers said, 'We're glad we're not going after him,' " Kunkel recalled. "Lo and behold, after that, he began conducting open-air, hand-to-hand drug sales." Police arrested Taleon for possessing about a half-ounce of crack cocaine and a loaded .25-caliber automatic handgun.

While handcuffed in the back of the moving car, Taleon smashed out the rear window by head-butting it, police said. He then dove through the window and its steel frame, causing $1,800 in damage, Kunkel said.

After landing on his face, Taleon rose to his feet and, while still handcuffed, fled on foot and into a nearby pond, police said.

"He swam across like Flipper, taunting the officers saying, 'You'll never catch me,' " Kunkel said.

And he wasn't caught. The blog that reported the story to me called him a mutant gay ninja supervillian. Gotta agree.

[dtb]

Originally posted by Icky Thump
Rule 1 of the work force: never work for a woman.

Like this one time I worked writing a brief for a woman partner -- she changed every though to although, every although to though, every however to nevertheless and every nevertheless to however. Then for the second draft she changed them all back and screamed at me for changing them in the first rewrite. Over the memorial day weekend.

The fact that you are comfortable making that post -- in response to a woman, no less - is, well, disappointing, to put it mildly.

What's Rule #2 of the work force? Never work for a black person? A Jew? A spic? A fag?

(Oh, wait - you're not comfortable admitting that?)

[bold_n_brazen]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
My new favorite headline of all time (formerly, "Man, woman, serpent die in firey crash")

[url=http://www.philly.com/philly/news/20080227_Twin_gay-porn_stars_arrested_in_rooftop_burglaries.html]Twin gay-porn stars arrested in rooftop burglaries

It's even better: And he wasn't caught. The blog that reported the story to me called him a mutant gay ninja supervillian. Gotta agree.

[/QUOTE]

I am so proud to be from Philly.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by dtb
The fact that you are comfortable making that post -- in response to a woman, no less - is, well, disappointing, to put it mildly.

What's Rule #2 of the work force? Never work for a black person? A Jew? A spic? A fag?

(Oh, wait - you're not comfortable admitting that?)

rule 2 is don't be caught splitting up a lunch check if there are Jews at the table.

[Not Bob]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
Do you ever do this to her? Because that would be sexy.

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1049/...1679ec22_o.jpg

That may work for Icky, but it's too forward for gents like me. See the indecision in my face?

[Flinty_McFlint]

Originally posted by dtb
The fact that you are comfortable making that post -- in response to a woman, no less - is, well, disappointing, to put it mildly.

What's Rule #2 of the work force? Never work for a black person? A Jew? A spic? A fag?

(Oh, wait - you're not comfortable admitting that?)

Those are all covered in Rule 1(a)(i)-(iv), I believe. Let me find my rulebook.

[notcasesensitive]

Originally posted by dtb
The fact that you are comfortable making that post -- in response to a woman, no less - is, well, disappointing, to put it mildly.

What's Rule #2 of the work force? Never work for a black person? A Jew? A spic? A fag?

(Oh, wait - you're not comfortable admitting that?)

I'm looking at the bright side and slapping a big old Exhibit A on the top of that post for the next time someone trots out the argument that women are treated equally in the workplace and there are no vestiges of discrimination.

[Flinty_McFlint]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
I'm looking at the bright side and slapping a big old Exhibit A on the top of that post for the next time someone trots out the argument that women are treated equally in the workplace and there are no vestiges of discrimination.

Women are treated equally in the workplace and there are no vestiges of discrimination. Move along, nothing to see here.

[greatwhitenorthchick]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
I'm looking at the bright side and slapping a big old Exhibit A on the top of that post for the next time someone trots out the argument that women are treated equally in the workplace and there are no vestiges of discrimination.

I like my discrimination like I like my men: slapping me across the face first thing in the morning.

So, not to detract from sexism and those who love it, eat it for breakfast and smear it on their heads like Rogaine, but my friend just randomly sent me this Morrissey quote which I found quite funny. To brighten your day:

“I was driving my car,
I crashed and broke my spine,
So yes, there are things worse in life than
never being some-one’s sweetie.” -Morrissey

[J. Fred Muggs]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
I like my discrimination like I like my men: slapping me across the face first thing in the morning.

Would have been much funnier as "I like my discrimination like I like cocks: slapping me across the face first thing in the morning."

I should quit this job of mine and get a job editing wwtdd.com

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by dtb

What's Rule #2 of the work force?

Don't talk about Rule #1.

[greatwhitenorthchick]

Originally posted by J. Fred Muggs
Would have been much funnier as "I like my discrimination like I like cocks: slapping me across the face first thing in the morning."

I should quit this job of mine and get a job editing wwtdd.com

Thanks for reminding me of Rule #1 of comedy: women aren't funny.

[Flinty_McFlint]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
Thanks for reminding me of Rule #1 of comedy: women aren't funny.

Neither is Muggs, so don't let that stop you.

[dtb]

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Don't talk about Rule #1.

Except the subpart about women, I guess. Always open season on the beeyatches!

(Especially the uppity ones.)