A fashion board in which sometimes we'll remember to post spoiler warnings

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy

That poor girl.

But has this been news at any time in the last 30 years?

Co-ed showers* were news when I was in college, and that was short of 30 years ago.


*Not the kind RT's sister takes.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally Posted by Fugee

You're not really an "adult" if your parents are footing the bill for your school. But I don't think writing an article in the National Review is the best forum for a family discussion.

That student is an adult.

The conditions set on footing the bill should be between the student and the parents. The NR article is some wild cautionary tale warning other conservative parents about the housing policies at elite schools. And the blame is set on the shoulders of the wrong party. If parents are going to pull bullshit like this, they should make it clear to their children what the consequences are, so the students can make alternate plans to either comply with parents' strings or seek other sources of funding.

And if this mother is anything like the parent with a JD I most recently had to deal with, she probably was unclear to the school about whether she was bitching in her capacity as a mother or as the legal counsel for the student.

ETA: This article should have been a smug "I cut my daughter off for not believing in the things I do" instead of a "how dare these colleges allow children make adult decisions!!"

[Cletus Miller]

Originally Posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)

Co-ed showers* were news when I was in college, and that was short of 30 years ago.


*Not the kind RT's sister takes.

But that was accompanied by a photo in the paper. So I think it was just journalistic sensationalism. Sell more papers!

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally Posted by Cletus Miller

Sell more papers!

Yes, the profit is all in the volume.

[Fugee]

Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy

I think she demonstrates more inditia of adulthood than her parents.

What are her inditia of adulthood? Just because she is comfortable with a co-ed dorm room?

When you are depending on your parents to foot your bills, I think there is an obligation to respect their values -- at least for the stuff they are paying for.

I could never have lived in student housing where I'd have to switch rooms every quarter. Once I get comfortable, I don't like to make changes.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally Posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)

He's such an airhead I almost believe his story. Almost.

It's weird. But he falls into the class of guys (which includes Pujols and Howard) that I don't think have ever juiced. HGH? Maybe.

TM

[Cletus Miller]

Originally Posted by Fugee

When you are depending on your parents to foot your bills, I think there is an obligation to respect their values -- at least for the stuff they are paying for.

They were paying 1/3 of her tuition. She was funding the rest thru loans/grants/work. $3k isn't enough (I think) to pay her rooming expense for the quarter; certainly not enough to pay room & board, even in a co-op. Which 20% of her Spring Quarter educational expense were they paying for?

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally Posted by Fugee

What are her inditia of adulthood? Just because she is comfortable with a co-ed dorm room?

When you are depending on your parents to foot your bills, I think there is an obligation to respect their values -- at least for the stuff they are paying for.

I could never have lived in student housing where I'd have to switch rooms every quarter. Once I get comfortable, I don't like to make changes.

Flinty says it better.

[Flinty_McFlint]

Originally Posted by Fugee

What are her inditia of adulthood? Just because she is comfortable with a co-ed dorm room?

Well, she seemed able to take her lumps in stride without the need of politicizing family business in a national publication. So there's that.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally Posted by Replaced_Texan

I've had to deal with parents getting all mixed up in their adult children's educations, but fortunately, none were so moved to write in the National Review* about it. Poor kid.

One of my sisters went to Stanford and lived three out of the four years in a co-op. She loved it there. The ONLY downside is that my parents thought she was a lesbian for a few years**, because the co-op in question was the LGBT house. Lord help that poor girl in the article above if her parents had caught her at Terra House.


*Note: link goes to the daughter's response in a NYT blog post about the NR article.

**Turns out not a lesbian.

giving up control is very scary, and what magnifies it for me is the "cell phone issue." when we were in school you'd call home, what, once a week? my kid calls her mom every dad as she walks between classes. you get ever ripple of emotional ups and downs, whereas our parents only heard of the longer lasting waves.

so we know our kid if not anywhere near being able to make it, but hopefully remind ourselves the only way to get her there is to leave her alone to make most decisions.

but the whole "gender neutral" crap reminds me of some group think I saw a million years ago. on my dorm floor is this junior, nice young man, very much a jock, and co-incidentally the President of the MSU Gay-Lesbian Association.

he is assigned a roommate from a school on Northern Lake Huron shoreline. the kid is from a graduating class of seven. here he is living in a school with 20000 kids, which is more than enough of a challenge, and his roommate is bringing guys home and asking him to leave the room for an hour.

I think I wouldn't have been bothered by being the Prez's roommate, but this kid couldn't do it. He tried to get help from the RA, whose response was the canned "Part of college is learning to appreciate everyone else and their unique outlook." Okay, but that seemed like advice not well directed to the particular kid.

I wonder how voluntary the "neutral" housing option* is, because I could see the girl being somewhat co-erced into being cool with it, and I would be pissed as her parent if that were the case.

*and my daughter's roommate beginning June 1 is a gay man, and we are all happy with him, so I'm just saying these policies can become forced on people that maybe aren't the right ones to be asked to deal with them.

[Cletus Miller]

Originally Posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)

Yes, the profit is all in the volume.

Thus the economic model behind Excite and Web 1.0, generally.

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally Posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)

Co-ed showers* were news when I was in college, and that was short of 30 years ago.


*Not the kind RT's sister takes.

We had a little sign outside the showers (two showers, about 25 students!) in the bathroom on our floor that the occupants could move to show whether the shower was open to men only, women only, or either. First person in set the rules until all current occupants agreed on a change Somehow, the choice was usually "women only" or "either".

I don't think the co-ed rooms in dorms and houses were official, but unofficial arrangements were certainly made. The co-ed suites were official, and room allocations within the suites were not made by the college.

Originally Posted by Tyrone Slothrop

Unreal.

Just what Chelsea deserved in the larger scheme of things (because I hate them), but the ref was truly terrible. Potential for a great final, though I think Barcelona may have a difficult time dealing with Man U in the same way they had trouble with Chelsea. A physical team that gets in Barca's faces and doesn't let them establish their passing game will always have a chance. And Man U is much more than that.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally Posted by ThurgreedMarshall

It's weird. But he falls into the class of guys (which includes Pujols and Howard) that I don't think have ever juiced. HGH? Maybe.

TM

Frank Thomas. He has always said that MLB needs drug testing. He has said it his whole career. And he voluntarily went in front of congress to tell them that a drug policy was necessary.

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally Posted by Fugee

When you are depending on your parents to foot your bills, I think there is an obligation to respect their values -- at least for the stuff they are paying for.
.

It doesn't sound like they ever discussed what her parents' values were in this respect. She signed up for a dorm she liked, and ended up in a coed room. She told her parents and there it is. It's not like she broke some rule of theirs that they had laid down.