It's all about me

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
That is so gay. nttawwt.

I think you mean "faggy." NTTAWWT.

[baltassoc]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
easy. go back to Men's Warehouse[sic] and buy another pair off the rack.

I suppose it's part of the insult to spell the store's name incorrectly. Not that I've ever shopped there.*


*Actually, I generally have to shop at Big & Tall stores, so I haven't ever successfully shopped there.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
I think you mean "faggy." NTTAWWT.

Hang on a minute. Which of SS's posts were you copying?

[NotFromHere]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
If I was an elite athlete and millionaire and I had a few hot young things with me, willing to do whatever the fuck I wanted AND I had probably had sex with innumerable such women, I would do whatever the fuck I wanted before taking them home to have sex with them. What the fuck are they going to say? "Replace me with some other hot young thing, please?" And since it's a regular thing for elite athletes (having sex with hot young things), the sex part really is no big deal and there's no need to rush.

In fact (and I'm no elite athlete, but I've had my share of casual sex), I often do whatever the fuck I want before having sex with hot young things because I know I can fuck them whenever I want.

So, yeah. If I wanted a Whopper for before, during or after my blow jobs and MFF, I would go to Burger King first.

What I don't get is why he went at all. He could have been playing Playstation while they went to fetch the Whoppers for him.

TM

Good point. Some reports say the chick was driving. He had been drinking vodka and cranberry all night. You wouldn't want to give the keys to your Lincoln to the drunk chick.

eta - Jack in the Box, not Burger King. my bad.

[Mister_Ruysbroeck]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Along these lines, I have been trying to domesticate this terrifically cute woodchuck that hangs out in my front yard. I had the bastard cornered last week and tried to offer him food, but he was too cunning for the vodka disabled human and managed to dart into some bushes. Anyone know what those things eat. I don't want to catch the little bastard, but I'd like to get him in the habit of hanging out near my porch so I can watch him and his brood. They really are neat looking little animals. I love it when they stand up and look around.

They are as bad as racoons. Trust me, you do NOT want them hanging around your house.

First, they'll strip all the bark off your trees in little 3 inch by 1 inch strips. After they've killed your trees, they'll move onto your cedar siding/deck.

I hear a .22 does the trick. You can use cats to kill the babies after you're done with the parents.

Anyway, you've been warned.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by Mister_Ruysbroeck
They are as bad as racoons. Trust me, you do NOT want them hanging around your house.

First, they'll strip all the bark off your trees in little 3 inch by 1 inch strips. After they've killed your trees, they'll move onto your cedar siding/deck.

I hear a .22 does the trick. You can use cats to kill the babies after you're done with the parents.

Anyway, you've been warned.

Or you could just pay me to drive around the neighborhood a few times. I'm sure I could hit one or two of them.

[dtb]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Along these lines, I have been trying to domesticate this terrifically cute woodchuck that hangs out in my front yard. I had the bastard cornered last week and tried to offer him food, but he was too cunning for the vodka disabled human and managed to dart into some bushes. Anyone know what those things eat. I don't want to catch the little bastard, but I'd like to get him in the habit of hanging out near my porch so I can watch him and his brood. They really are neat looking little animals. I love it when they stand up and look around.

OK, this is disgusting. Woodchucks are vile creatures. And they eat the radishes in my garden!

(Alright, I don't really have radishes, but if I did, the woodchucks would be a problem -- so there's your answer.)

Did I ever share the story of how, after the spring thaw, I went to empty out the watering can that somehow had enough water in it over the winter (I know -- I just should have put it in the garage, but I DIDN'T -- OK?!?!) to freeze into a solid block up to the top of the can. So anyway, after the thaw, I go to pour out the water, and A GIANT RAT CAME OUT WITH IT!!! AAAAAAGH!

That was so freaking disgusting -- I threw the can down, and ran away screaming. (How very brave of me, no?) My husband went to dispose of it, and informed me that it wasn't a rat (I thought it strange to see a rat in those parts -- mice, yes, but not rats), but a squirrel. It only looked like a rat, because its tail was no longer bushy, having been soggy right before Mr. Squirrel untimely met his maker.

[Flinty_McFlint]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
Every guy here should be able to comprehend some degree of what it's like to be an elite athlete. Am I the only one who dated a sophomore when I was a senior in HS?

You amateur. I dated middle schoolers when I was a Senior in HS. I was so cool.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
I think you mean "faggy." NTTAWWT.

Burn, baby, burn.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Flinty_McFlint
You amateur. I dated middle schoolers when I was a Senior in HS. I was so cool.

Prima?

[Not Bob]

Originally posted by SEC Issues
You men really overcomplicate things.

You're a chick? In keeping with FB tradition, please start exchanging salacious PMs with one of the married guys here. Let's see ... [checking records] ... I do believe that it's Sebby's turn to chat with an FB Betty. Alternatively, if same-sex flirting is your cup of chai, you have plenty of options to choose from. Although leagl is taken (at last report), there was at least one other gay woman poster, and there seems to be plenty of the on-line versions of LUGs.

Originally posted by SEC Issues
Sometimes a cigar is just something to ram up a pit bull's ass.

Indeed.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by Flinty_McFlint
You amateur. I dated middle schoolers when I was a Senior in HS. I was so cool.

How did they get to the Jack-in-the-Box when you wanted hamburgers? See why sophomores are key?

[dtb]

Originally posted by Atticus Grinch

The first possibility is the emotional trauma caused by the sudden and unprepared realization that one could actually be raped.* Men don't go through their day thinking about that, and haven't come to terms with that risk, as most women have. Feeling the atmosphere of sexual danger that women live with 24/7/365 is really quite jarring for men.

Thank you, Atticus. That is very well said, and something I have thought to be the case for years, despite protestations to the contrary. I liken it to the unease a woman feels (not all women -- but the person hooting/leering can't know what sort of woman you are if he doesn't know you!) when being hooted/leered/yelled at by strange (meaning, they don't know you -- but they're probably strange in the other sense of the word too) men while walking down the sidewalk, minding her own business.

Unwanted sexual attention is unwanted sexual attention, no matter where it comes from. That someone could on the one hand say that the "hey baby..." remark made by a man to a woman he doesn't know should be taken as flattery, and on the other hand that a man unreceptive (heh) to male sexual advances should feel insulted or threatened by similar behavior is ludicris (that's the street way to spell it). Yet I have heard many men preach this double standard. Losers.

[Mister_Ruysbroeck]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
Poor thing. I love snakes.

Trouser Snakes?

[Flinty_McFlint]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
How did they get to the Jack-in-the-Box when you wanted hamburgers? See why sophomores are key?

Actually, that's a good point. I will have to readjust my current dating plan. Thanks.