Removing the feeding tube from our aging hipster plaid pants

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
When is the next mink show? I am so there. I love watching them run around their cages endlessy 24/7 having panic attacks. Good show.

It's more fun when you go up to their cages and make "ZZZZZZZZZZTTTT, ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZTTT!" noises. Stupid little fuckers almost give you the fur off their backs after that.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
I didn't think of the ego issues that are being forced onto the mixed breeds that can't make the cut.

Hank, you cow-eating mongrel, you've got me on PETA's website now and I can't get off. (And was it you who posted about that Bravo show?)

http://www.peta.org/alert/automation...em.asp?id=1104

Bravo: Irresponsible New Series Will Cost Animals Their Lives

According to a July 22 NBC Universal news release, the Bravo television network will soon debut a new series, Showdog Moms & Dads. The release states that the program will focus on dog shows and “the passionate owners who sacrifice so much for the benefit of their pooch.”

On July 30, PETA shared members’ concerns and outrage over this plan with Bravo Senior Vice President of Programming and Production Frances Berwick. PETA reminded Ms. Berwick that our nation’s shelters are forced to kill between 3 and 4 million dogs and cats annually—an estimated 25 percent of whom are purebred—for lack of good homes and asked her to reconsider airing the series, which will inevitably promote the breeding of dogs. We also respectfully suggested that those who irresponsibly bring more animals into this overpopulated world—and often subsequently mutilate them for “cosmetic” purposes—are not making any sort of “sacrifice.”

We have yet to receive a response from Ms. Berwick. Please contact her and—in a kind and courteous manner—ask that she exercise her power to put the brakes on this potentially disastrous plan. Please also suggest that if she is not willing to cancel the series, she should consider showing how many other, equally deserving animals die in shelters in the time it takes for a breeder’s litter to be born. Advise Ms. Berwick that only that perspective would truly provide viewers with the “sneak peak … behind the scenes” at dog shows and “programming with a unique point of view” that the network promises:

Frances Berwick, Senior Vice President
Programming & Production
Bravo
30 Rockefeller Plz., Rm. 1485E
New York, NY 10112
646-202-4038 (fax)

P.S. Sneak peek!!!

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
You know, Hank, I was with you for awhile on that. Did you read The Hidden Lives of Dogs? Basically the author says that dogs are dogs and not humans and should be allowed to lead a dogs life.

Now, while I agree with this, especially the "dogs are dogs" part, the reality is that unless you live out in the sticks, you have to train your dog to function in a society which is not natural to the dog. Otherwise he could run off, get hit by a car, get over aggresive, you name it.

I agree. My dog is 1/2 Boxer 1/2 lab. He could kill me if he wanted.
He needed training.

I did think the strict PETA line would be against training- that's not saying you would follow the line- but you're nothing if not practical.

And really the training for the shows isn't anything they need to be in a city. Let a stranger rub at your body? Walk around in a circle not sniffing where you're going? On Showdogs the little rat dog bit the first judge they came up and started pawing at him- that seems like a natural response, but you know they''ll train all that out of him.

[str8outavannuys]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
Even though he's a wife beater and has the disco moves of a freight train?

I think Paigow's right about Bo, there aren't enough voting elderly women who remember Steppenwolf or Blood Sweat & Tears to vote for him. Constantine has, at least, the Justin Guarini effect going for him. Rabid females who will call all night just to get him through to the next round. They're (the biased media) saying that Scott is having the John Stevens effect. Not good, not bad - different enough, nobody really hates him - the ordinary guy vote.

I just put a substantial amount of money on Constantine (at +375 odds); enough money to pay for a chunk of my house renovations if it hits. I plan to sell enough of these option contracts once he makes the top 3 to cover my cost, and then sell more once he makes the top 2 (I'm not sure he can beat Carrie). Anyone think I'm an idiot? I'm playing with the house's money a bit here, having had a phenomenal month playing online poker.

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
Anyone think I'm an idiot?

Yes. And specifically for this. Fox has shown it can't even get the voting system right for the show, repeatedly. Would you bet on a horse race that you knew was fixed, but not for whom? I hope bra sales are up this month.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
I just put a substantial amount of money on Constantine (at +375 odds); enough money to pay for a chunk of my house renovations if it hits. I plan to sell enough of these option contracts once he makes the top 3 to cover my cost, and then sell more once he makes the top 2 (I'm not sure he can beat Carrie). Anyone think I'm an idiot? I'm playing with the house's money a bit here, having had a phenomenal month playing online poker.

I've been looking for a financial planner; have you got any spare time?

[str8outavannuys]

Originally posted by Anne Elk
Idaho House commends Jared and Jerusha Hess for making Napoleon Dynamite.

My favorite part:

18 WHEREAS, Uncle Rico's football skills are a testament to Idaho athletics;
19 and

27 WHEREAS, Napoleon's artistic rendition of Trisha is an example of the
28 importance of the visual arts in K-12 education;

Brilliant.

[bilmore]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
It's more fun when you go up to their cages and make "ZZZZZZZZZZTTTT, ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZTTT!" noises. Stupid little fuckers almost give you the fur off their backs after that.

Don't even start. I'm still in trouble with PETA for using the phrase "kill two birds with one stone" last year in a brief.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by bilmore
Don't even start. I'm still in trouble with PETA for using the phrase "kill two birds with one stone" last year in a brief.

PETA has an anti-cliche division?

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
18 WHEREAS, Uncle Rico's football skills are a testament to Idaho athletics;
19 and

27 WHEREAS, Napoleon's artistic rendition of Trisha is an example of the
28 importance of the visual arts in K-12 education;

Brilliant.

Maybe. But Kip had to go to Michigan to get some sweet ass.

[str8outavannuys]

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Yes. And specifically for this. Fox has shown it can't even get the voting system right for the show, repeatedly. Would you bet on a horse race that you knew was fixed, but not for whom? I hope bra sales are up this month.

I'm betting that Fox wants the cute guy to beat the scary looking guy.

[andViolins]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
I just put a substantial amount of money on Constantine (at +375 odds); enough money to pay for a chunk of my house renovations if it hits. I plan to sell enough of these option contracts once he makes the top 3 to cover my cost, and then sell more once he makes the top 2 (I'm not sure he can beat Carrie). Anyone think I'm an idiot? I'm playing with the house's money a bit here, having had a phenomenal month playing online poker.

Drudge is reporting that ABC is preparing a big news expose on Idol and the relationship between the judges and the contestants. I imagine that oddsmakers will not be too happy if the whole thing is fixed.

aV

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
[T]he reality is that unless you live out in the sticks, you have to train your dog to function in a society which is not natural to the dog.

Dogs are not wild animals. They are domesticated. Being trained to function in society is what dogs have been bred to do. Different breeds have different functions. In the same way that you train a toddler to function in society by teaching him to poop in a toilet and not to walk into the street, you teach a dog to function in society by teaching him to sit on command and not to jump on people.

I don't always get PETA's thinking on domesticated animals. Like cattle. Cattle exist because we are going to eat them. They have been domesticated to that end. If we stop eating meat, people will stop raising cattle, and then they won't exist any more. It's not like they're going to go back to the wild to exist in their earlier condition.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by Tyrone Slothrop
Dogs are not wild animals. They are domesticated. Being trained to function in society is what dogs have been bred to do. Different breeds have different functions. In the same way that you train a toddler to function in society by teaching him to poop in a toilet and not to walk into the street, you teach a dog to function in society by teaching him to sit on command and not to jump on people.

Why not let the child be a child and walk into the street to poop there?

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
Why not let the child be a child and walk into the street to poop there?

If I'm babysitting a friend's kids, sure.