Happy Birthday, Preston Michael Spears Federline and other Certain Special Someones!

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
How bad does it have to get to find yourself jacking off in booth in a byo porn shop/club? I'd just start shooting heroin and get it all over with before I sunk to that gig.

Section 5 (30 points)

Match the unbearable situation/degrading experience with the appropriate form of self-destruction:

1. Jacking off in BYO porn shop
2. Working mid-level managment job at insurance company
3. Visible stomach below belt line
4. Comb-over
5. Watching shopping network in stained Fruit of Loom Briefs
6. Listening to music with horns

A. Shoot heroin; get it all over with
B. French kiss business end of .44
C. Pop rocks/soda at same time
D. Eat diced pineapple from crack whore's crack
E. Draino sundae
F. Both barrels under chin, toe on trigger