Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a row

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally Posted by evenodds

Ennui, like depression, can be seriously crippling. He is engaged directly in philanthropic passions, he gives away a lot of money to charities and philanthropies, he collects things, he is a competitive athlete, and he is amazing in bed. He believes that through activity he can escape this soul-crushing emptiness he feels.

But he can't.

So, he climbs a mountain and feels empty. He saves people and feels empty. He starts new businesses, he endows programs, he develops new philanthropic ventures and he feels empty.

Being with me, though he loves/loved me, felt empty.

I am not talking about simple pleasure or small joys, but he has the time to obsess: "Am I really happy at a core level?"

That is really the difference between the Chimney Sweep and the Artist formerly known as the Luckiest Man Alive. The Chimney Sweep may have a passing thought "am I really happy?" as he sits in a boardroom or a courtroom, but then there are things to be done. TAFMATLMA can spend hours staring at his own navel, exploring the topography of his own intestinal track and never worry how he will make a car payment or how his employees will make theirs.

My grandfather never had to work. He did because he found it edifying to start companies, hire people, change lives, etc. I do not believe he ever actually made any money from his ventures. It's just what he did for fun -- that and spend time with his grandchildren. My father spent years trying to find himself, until he realized money is ephemeral. My great-grandfather on the other side never escaped his crushing ennui. He tried through art, through acquisitions, etc., but he never escaped the feeling that he was really and truly miserable all the time.

Because of who TAFMATLMA is and what he does, he has time to live deeply inside his own head and obsess over things that other people do not simply have time to worry about. That is the downside of having the freedom that comes with wealth. You can obsess over whether you're truly happy, and for a lot of us, we're just not and no amount of tutoring inner city kids will fix him.

That's what his therapist is for . . . and clearly she's doing a bang-up job.

Sorry, but I am finding this all extremely hard to believe.

This guy is a self-made millionaire, brilliant, athletic, good looking, great in bed and generous with his time and money, but you broke up with him because of "ennui" and that one time he was busy when you wanted to eat pizza and watch the game?

Something is getting left out.

TM