No Faith in the Moral Standards of the Players as a Group

[Icky Thump]

Originally Posted by Not Bob

Personally, I'm more of a fan of "as if."

For example: "Hazel Agnes O'Leary ("Plaintiff") alleges that Piggly Wiggly Highway 64 Podunk LLC ("the Store") was on constructive notice of the puddle of lardo that she slipped in based upon a purported admission made by an unidentified teen-aged employee of the Store after the fall. The statement -- 'Bro, I totally missed that goo on my last mop dance. My bad.' -- appears nowhere in the record other than in the Plaintiff's Complaint and in her own self-serving affidavit in opposition to the Store's motion. Did the Plaintiff submit sufficient evidence that the Store had 'constructive notice' of the lardo? As if."

Nice. I legit wrote this in a brief today.

Piggly Wiggly's failure to comply with discovery includes producing a person who knew less than Jon Snow (who did “know some things”) . . . .