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04-22-2011, 05:23 PM
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#3376
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I am beyond a rank!
Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 11,873
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Re: Lamest k race win ever
Quote:
Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield
"And then as the cab was turning left on Main, she pulled her head back and hit that spot near the tip that drives me nuts and -- well, it had been some time since the pipes had been cleaned, and the backlog... well, let's just say those trousers cost $20 to clean. And we had to use two bottles of detangler to get her hair unclumped. It was amazing. Semen was everywhere, all over everything.
Until that point, I had no idea my testicles held that much semen. It had to be at least five or six spoons' worth. And not tablespoons -- serving spoons. You know those big ones that are kind of like flat ladels? Like that. Frankly, I wouldn't be surprised if it filled a gravy boat. The inside of the car looked like we'd been hit with a water balloon filled with alfredo sauce."
This is not sexy?
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I prefer carbonara to alfredo, so not really.
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Where are my elephants?!?!
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04-22-2011, 05:33 PM
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#3377
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: The Duchy of Penske
Posts: 2,088
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Re: Lamest k race win ever
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski
any idea how she got herself appointed to the board?
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Raw talent.
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Man I smashed it like an Idaho potato!
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04-22-2011, 05:35 PM
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#3378
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: The Duchy of Penske
Posts: 2,088
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Re: Lamest k race win ever
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sidd Finch
Much as I truly love the female orgasm, the whole squirting thing has never done anything for me. Just saying.
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It fascinates me. But then again, lactation lover, right?
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Man I smashed it like an Idaho potato!
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04-22-2011, 05:39 PM
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#3379
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Proud Holder-Post 200,000
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Corner Office
Posts: 86,149
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Re: Lamest k race win ever
Quote:
Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield
If you're masturbating anywhere you can be seen doing so by classmates, ridicule probably is in order.
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Football camp was a whole week
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I will not suffer a fool- but I do seem to read a lot of their posts
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04-22-2011, 05:56 PM
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#3380
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Patch Diva
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Winter Wonderland
Posts: 4,607
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Hank outed
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04-23-2011, 03:48 PM
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#3381
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Proud Holder-Post 200,000
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Corner Office
Posts: 86,149
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Re: Lamest k race win ever
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I will not suffer a fool- but I do seem to read a lot of their posts
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04-23-2011, 08:37 PM
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#3382
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Wearing the cranky pants
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Pulling your finger
Posts: 7,122
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Re: Lamest k race win ever
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Boogers!
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04-23-2011, 08:52 PM
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#3383
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Wearing the cranky pants
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Pulling your finger
Posts: 7,122
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Happy Easter.
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Boogers!
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04-25-2011, 11:24 AM
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#3384
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[intentionally omitted]
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: NYC
Posts: 18,597
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For Ty:
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04-25-2011, 12:35 PM
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#3385
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Genius Known As ABBAKiss
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Wonderland
Posts: 3,540
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Re: Lamest k race win ever
Actual Question Alert! I am still very upset every day about not having an intact family* for my child, and when she is with her sperm donor I am upset constantly. Does anyone have any advice or ideas for what I can do about this? Are there support groups? Anything I can do? Help! It's getting worse, not better with time.
*My husband is awesome, but I am upset because ABBAKid is in a broken home and I feel like I only get to be half a mother, and it upsets me constantly.
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"Do the sex." --TM
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04-25-2011, 12:53 PM
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#3386
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It's all about me.
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Enough about me. Let's talk about you. What do you think of me?
Posts: 6,004
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Re: Lamest k race win ever
Quote:
Originally Posted by ABBAKiss
Actual Question Alert! I am still very upset every day about not having an intact family* for my child, and when she is with her sperm donor I am upset constantly. Does anyone have any advice or ideas for what I can do about this? Are there support groups? Anything I can do? Help! It's getting worse, not better with time.
*My husband is awesome, but I am upset because ABBAKid is in a broken home and I feel like I only get to be half a mother, and it upsets me constantly.
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I am going to say this as gently as I can.
You need therapy.
You're her mother. Period. When you're with her. When you're not. And her father is her father. Period.
All of this is bad for her. You have to love her more than you hate him.
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Always game for a little hand-to-hand chainsaw combat.
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04-25-2011, 12:57 PM
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#3387
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Genius Known As ABBAKiss
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Wonderland
Posts: 3,540
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Re: Lamest k race win ever
Quote:
Originally Posted by bold_n_brazen
All of this is bad for her. You have to love her more than you hate him.
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I do love her more than I hate him, which is why it upsets me when she is not with me. I did not have a child to be childless half the time.
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"Do the sex." --TM
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04-25-2011, 12:58 PM
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#3388
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Moderasaurus Rex
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 33,080
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Re: For Ty:
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThurgreedMarshall
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That's good stuff. Without the slow motion replays, I'd have a lot of trouble picking up on most of that.
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“It was fortunate that so few men acted according to moral principle, because it was so easy to get principles wrong, and a determined person acting on mistaken principles could really do some damage." - Larissa MacFarquhar
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04-25-2011, 01:06 PM
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#3389
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Flaired.
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Out with Lumbergh.
Posts: 9,954
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Re: Ipad 2 (reposted from the other wrong board)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Adder
The question is wifi vs. wireless data plan from verizon or at&t. Airplane requires wifi.
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We have the data plan one. The main times we've used the service have been when traveling. It is nice if you want to use the iPad for navigation on trips and probably works out to be cheaper (for us) than paying for stupid fancy hotel wireless service.
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See you later, decorator.
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04-25-2011, 01:11 PM
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#3390
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[intentionally omitted]
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: NYC
Posts: 18,597
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Re: Lamest k race win ever
Quote:
Originally Posted by ABBAKiss
I do love her more than I hate him, which is why it upsets me when she is not with me. I did not have a child to be childless half the time.
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I don't know what to tell you. I see my daughter every weekend and talk to her every night. It sucks, but there is absolutely nothing to be done about it. Be the best parent you can be when you have her (which I'm sure you are). Find something to do when you don't. And do your best to normalize your relationship with her father. That's about it. I would add that I wouldn't make it so obvious how upset you are that you don't have her all the time or that you'd rather she be with you 100% of the time or that her father is a selfish asshole. She will pick up on those things. They will damage her. She will either adopt whatever feelings she picks up from you or will resent you for having the feelings you're having.
You're going to have to learn to deal and, like bnb says, that may mean you need therapy.
TM |
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