Towards A Virtual Williamsburg!

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally Posted by barely_legal

Remember before most of us had met each other and we talked mostly about sex and stuff on this board?

Well, in that vein, I would welcome advice from people here who I suspect have more knowledge of sex toys than I do. I kept bugging my baby brother to tell me what he wants for his upcoming birthday. Finally, he suggested a fleshlight. I'm pretty sure he only asked for one because he assumed I was too prudish to either know what it was or to buy it for him. He clearly doesn't know me as well as he thinks he does.

So, I don't know anything about these products, and I'm not going to google at work, so if anybody has any suggestions for me to keep in mind when I go shopping online tonight, please feel free to share. He did ask me if I could buy him an Asian model, and I have no idea what that means so I'm going to pretend it was a joke.

has he dated much? if not, did your parents bathe you together when you were little? you may know better than the rest of us about his expectations.

[barely_legal]

Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski

has he dated much? if not, did your parents bathe you together when you were little? you may know better than the rest of us about his expectations.

He is 25 and I'm pretty sure has had more sexual partners than I have. We didn't bathe together since he's 13 years younger than me but I did change many of his diapers. I'm pretty sure that experience did not prepare me to choose a sex toy for him.

Here's a fun little story about my brother for context, I guess. A few years ago, I was visiting my mother for the weekend when my brother still lived at home. My mom and I woke him up in the morning to tell him we were going shopping and remind him to take the dog out while we were gone. When he opened his door to talk to us, we saw a girl in his bed. My mother apparently was totally cool with that, but upon seeing the girl, loudly asked my brother, "oh, who is that? Is she the dancer?"

Later, I asked my mother if she knew the girl, and she said that she'd been around the house before hanging out with my brother but she thought they were just friends. I asked my mother what kind of dancer she was, thinking maybe she was a ballet dancer or a salsa instructor or something (give me a break, he's my baby brother). She said she didn't know, but in kind of an annoyed way. I said, then how do you know she's a dancer? She replied "I guess she dances with poles, is that what you wanted to know?" This was my mother's way of informing me that the young lady in question was a stripper.

My brother is also 5'3" and weighed about 100 lbs soaking wet at the time. He's pretty much a delicate little flower. A delicate little flower who bangs strippers.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally Posted by barely_legal

He is 25 and I'm pretty sure has had more sexual partners than I have. We didn't bathe together since he's 13 years younger than me but I did change many of his diapers. I'm pretty sure that experience did not prepare me to choose a sex toy for him.

Here's a fun little story about my brother for context, I guess. A few years ago, I was visiting my mother for the weekend when my brother still lived at home. My mom and I woke him up in the morning to tell him we were going shopping and remind him to take the dog out while we were gone. When he opened his door to talk to us, we saw a girl in his bed. My mother apparently was totally cool with that, but upon seeing the girl, loudly asked my brother, "oh, who is that? Is she the dancer?"

Later, I asked my mother if she knew the girl, and she said that she'd been around the house before hanging out with my brother but she thought they were just friends. I asked my mother what kind of dancer she was, thinking maybe she was a ballet dancer or a salsa instructor or something (give me a break, he's my baby brother). She said she didn't know, but in kind of an annoyed way. I said, then how do you know she's a dancer? She replied "I guess she dances with poles, is that what you wanted to know?" This was my mother's way of informing me that the young lady in question was a stripper.

My brother is also 5'3" and weighed about 100 lbs soaking wet at the time. He's pretty much a delicate little flower. A delicate little flower who bangs strippers.

this may help http://www.buzzfeed.com/svoip/china-...l-mushroo-4y59 Maybe NSFW

[The Tiny, Tiny Ex]

Originally Posted by barely_legal

Remember before most of us had met each other and we talked mostly about sex and stuff on this board?

Well, in that vein, I would welcome advice from people here who I suspect have more knowledge of sex toys than I do. I kept bugging my baby brother to tell me what he wants for his upcoming birthday. Finally, he suggested a fleshlight. I'm pretty sure he only asked for one because he assumed I was too prudish to either know what it was or to buy it for him. He clearly doesn't know me as well as he thinks he does.

So, I don't know anything about these products, and I'm not going to google at work, so if anybody has any suggestions for me to keep in mind when I go shopping online tonight, please feel free to share. He did ask me if I could buy him an Asian model, and I have no idea what that means so I'm going to pretend it was a joke.

I was going to make a little (ha! I kill me!) joke about getting your brother the pint sized version of the Fleshlight, but your follow up post took the fun out of that.

Anyhoo, carry on.

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally Posted by hank chinaski

this may help http://www.buzzfeed.com/svoip/china-...l-mushroo-4y59 maybe nsfw

滑稽!

[Sidd Finch]

Originally Posted by barely_legal

He is 25 and I'm pretty sure has had more sexual partners than I have. We didn't bathe together since he's 13 years younger than me but I did change many of his diapers. I'm pretty sure that experience did not prepare me to choose a sex toy for him.

Here's a fun little story about my brother for context, I guess. A few years ago, I was visiting my mother for the weekend when my brother still lived at home. My mom and I woke him up in the morning to tell him we were going shopping and remind him to take the dog out while we were gone. When he opened his door to talk to us, we saw a girl in his bed. My mother apparently was totally cool with that, but upon seeing the girl, loudly asked my brother, "oh, who is that? Is she the dancer?"

Later, I asked my mother if she knew the girl, and she said that she'd been around the house before hanging out with my brother but she thought they were just friends. I asked my mother what kind of dancer she was, thinking maybe she was a ballet dancer or a salsa instructor or something (give me a break, he's my baby brother). She said she didn't know, but in kind of an annoyed way. I said, then how do you know she's a dancer? She replied "I guess she dances with poles, is that what you wanted to know?" This was my mother's way of informing me that the young lady in question was a stripper.

My brother is also 5'3" and weighed about 100 lbs soaking wet at the time. He's pretty much a delicate little flower. A delicate little flower who bangs strippers.

And yet he needs a fleshlight? Maybe you should ignore that request and get him a book about sex addiction or something.

[Sidd Finch]

Originally Posted by Sidd Finch

And yet he needs a fleshlight? Maybe you should ignore that request and get him a book about sex addiction or something.

Note to B&B: I said this merely as a lighthearted suggestion and not as a demand for how BL or her brother run his, her, or their lives. Just making sure.

[Adder]

Originally Posted by Sidd Finch

And yet he needs a fleshlight? Maybe you should ignore that request and get him a book about sex addiction or something.

That's it, I think we are officially done here.

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally Posted by Sidd Finch

Note to B&B: I said this merely as a lighthearted suggestion and not as a demand for how BL or her brother run his, her, or their lives. Just making sure.

I don't know. I think BL needs to up the gift. Go beyond the fleshlight. Maybe a nice ring or plug or something as well.

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally Posted by Icky Thump

4g Ipad mini -- I have Verizon data share plan so I can add to it to my voluminous data plan for $10.

While Verizon's call service is great, data, not so much. Should I get an ATT one for an extra $20 a month? Then I can use it in Europe if I ever go.

How is Verizon's 4g compared to ATT's in TCOTU?

Check, but I thought the Verizon 4G models had chips that operate in Europe (as is the case with the iPhone 5).

[taxwonk]

Originally Posted by barely_legal

He is 25 and I'm pretty sure has had more sexual partners than I have. We didn't bathe together since he's 13 years younger than me but I did change many of his diapers. I'm pretty sure that experience did not prepare me to choose a sex toy for him.

Here's a fun little story about my brother for context, I guess. A few years ago, I was visiting my mother for the weekend when my brother still lived at home. My mom and I woke him up in the morning to tell him we were going shopping and remind him to take the dog out while we were gone. When he opened his door to talk to us, we saw a girl in his bed. My mother apparently was totally cool with that, but upon seeing the girl, loudly asked my brother, "oh, who is that? Is she the dancer?"

Later, I asked my mother if she knew the girl, and she said that she'd been around the house before hanging out with my brother but she thought they were just friends. I asked my mother what kind of dancer she was, thinking maybe she was a ballet dancer or a salsa instructor or something (give me a break, he's my baby brother). She said she didn't know, but in kind of an annoyed way. I said, then how do you know she's a dancer? She replied "I guess she dances with poles, is that what you wanted to know?" This was my mother's way of informing me that the young lady in question was a stripper.

My brother is also 5'3" and weighed about 100 lbs soaking wet at the time. He's pretty much a delicate little flower. A delicate little flower who bangs strippers.

POTD. And not just post of the day, but post of the decade. That last sentence? Magnificent. Understated in its elegance and concision.

God, we haven't had enough of this sort of thing in years.

[taxwonk]

Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski

this may help http://www.buzzfeed.com/svoip/china-...l-mushroo-4y59 Maybe NSFW

Apparently China has something like the Onion. Or some Asian country. Or a bunch of wacky kids in southern California.

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally Posted by taxwonk

POTD. And not just post of the day, but post of the decade. That last sentence? Magnificent. Understated in its elegance and concision.

God, we haven't had enough of this sort of thing in years.

I give you a double entendre in Chinese, and you go fawning all over her like that?

[taxwonk]

Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy

I give you a double entendre in Chinese, and you go fawning all over her like that?

Should have been in Urdu.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally Posted by bold_n_brazen

I can't let the dog thing go, apparently.

I understand your secretary's desire not to stand by and let a dog die. I do not understand how that translates into a campaign to forbid people from running with their dog.

One of the things that befuddles me about our society right now is people's absolute belief that they know how others should live their lives, and the willingness to impose those beliefs on others.

Well, I guess it's the same in her mind as the people who get upset about dogs left in cars. And I think she cares more about the dogs than the people. I don't think she's trying to make it illegal or anything, but if she sees a dog in distress, she's gonna say something and at least get information to dog owners.