Stuck on Repeats

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally Posted by Fugee

Maybe that's what men do but, in my experience, women have more conversations about this kind of thing. I know way more about my close friends' sex lives than their husbands/BFs would believe possible.

And even if you don't dish to your friends, it seems like a natural thing to discuss with your doctor. I do know a woman who talked about it with her doctor. No woman who doesn't live under a rock could possibly think pain every time during sex was a normal thing.

At the least, I would expect her to talk to her imaginary internet friends. That's what we're here for.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally Posted by Fugee

Maybe that's what men do but, in my experience, women have more conversations about this kind of thing. I know way more about my close friends' sex lives than their husbands/BFs would believe possible.

And even if you don't dish to your friends, it seems like a natural thing to discuss with your doctor. I do know a woman who talked about it with her doctor. No woman who doesn't live under a rock could possibly think pain every time during sex was a normal thing.

I wasn't going for a Mars/Venus thing. It was a meta point.

But, since you offered... It is true guys don't talk about sex as much. I couldn't imagine saying to a buddy of mine, "So I'm in bed with [insert wife's name] and we're going reverse cowgirl, and it doesn't feel all that great. She likes me to reach around and play with her from the front during it, you know-- [Insert his wife's name] likes that too, I'm sure. Anyway, I've got this wicked tennis elbow, and when I'm trying to get my arm around her..."

This isn't done. We don't share like that. Thank God. (We reserve such talk for anonymous chat boards.)

However, this conversation does occur:

"You ever get an STD?"

"No."

"Ever get burning when you p--"

"Does it drip afterward, even when you haven't pissed recently?"

"Yes! You've had this?"

"No."

"You know what it's called?"

"Gonorrhea. Perhaps chlamydia. You'll need to see a doctor. They'll do a swab. It's incredibly painful... I'm told. Then some antibiotics... I believe. If you don't, it will not subside on its own and could cause serious damage, including long term prostatitis."

[Sidd Finch]

Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski

how is it "reverse?" Seems pretty much just wonking.

He's moving backwards in time (at least that's what I thought he was doing), responding to a post from yesterday and then from one last week. Wonk moves in an orderly progression starting from a post last month and moving towards today. It's like a little retrospective.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally Posted by Sidd Finch

He's moving backwards in time (at least that's what I thought he was doing), responding to a post from yesterday and then from one last week. Wonk moves in an orderly progression starting from a post last month and moving towards today. It's like a little retrospective.

Yes, Wonk is orderly and predictable in his orderly ways. I hadn't noticed Sebby was going from newer to older, but wouldn't that be "bizarro Wonking?"

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally Posted by Replaced_Texan

name it, whoever won the K race

ETA: Hank.

Fuck... He's going to pick some hackneyed shit title.

[Fugee]

Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield

I wasn't going for a Mars/Venus thing. It was a meta point.

But, since you offered... It is true guys don't talk about sex as much. I couldn't imagine saying to a buddy of mine, "So I'm in bed with [insert wife's name] and we're going reverse cowgirl, and it doesn't feel all that great. She likes me to reach around and play with her from the front during it, you know-- [Insert his wife's name] likes that too, I'm sure. Anyway, I've got this wicked tennis elbow, and when I'm trying to get my arm around her..."

This isn't done. We don't share like that. Thank God. (We reserve such talk for anonymous chat boards.)

I think I missed your meta point.

The women I know don't get as graphic as your example either. But I would expect pain to be discussed -- at the very least for the question to come up whether it always hurts for anyone else.

Maybe I'm a wimp about pain but I can't imagine silently putting up with it.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally Posted by Fugee

I think I missed your meta point.

The women I know don't get as graphic as your example either. But I would expect pain to be discussed -- at the very least for the question to come up whether it always hurts for anyone else.

Maybe I'm a wimp about pain but I can't imagine silently putting up with it.

In my years of being a sympathetic ear for many girlfriends, offering sage advice on all from lost loves, to whether or not kids are a good idea, to simply "getting the romance back," I have come to the conclusion some women simply aren't comfortable talking openly about sex. It's a tragic trap of neuroses and residual hang-ups from patriarchal rearing for so many.

[taxwonk]

Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield

This peeping tom stuff is going to get you in deep shit one day. Four words: Not a mere misdemeanor.

Look, just because you married a "nice" girl, that doesn't give you license to be getting all up in my shit.

[taxwonk]

Originally Posted by Sidd Finch

He's moving backwards in time (at least that's what I thought he was doing), responding to a post from yesterday and then from one last week. Wonk moves in an orderly progression starting from a post last month and moving towards today. It's like a little retrospective.

A little retrospective? A little retrospective? Fuck you, Buddy. I am the fucking soul of FB past (recent history division).

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally Posted by Fugee

Maybe I'm a wimp about pain but I can't imagine silently putting up with it.

The author was a senior in college, 22, and having her first penetrative sexual experience. We'd like to think that because she grew up to write for New York Magazine, she must have been educated about sex at some point prior to that, but I've learned this is an unsafe assumption -- a person can be very accomplished in clothed life while being weirdly misinformed about sex for a very long time, sometimes their whole lives.

If she held off on sex because she dreaded it, then gave it up for love of her "first real boyfriend" at 22, then experiencing pain during sex would have confirmed her expectations, so no need to call a doctor, right? I think her behavior is entirely WNL for a lot of women. (I also think her use of "rape" as a way of describing bad consensual sex is demeaning to survivors of non-consensual sex, which is an entirely different and worse experience. If I were with her in the clinic I would tell her to check the "No" box -- none of this dithering about "diet caffeine free rape" bullshit.)

[Adder]

Originally Posted by Atticus Grinch

The author was a senior in college, 22, and having her first penetrative sexual experience. We'd like to think that because she grew up to write for New York Magazine, she must have been educated about sex at some point prior to that, but I've learned this is an unsafe assumption -- a person can be very accomplished in clothed life while being weirdly misinformed about sex for a very long time, sometimes their whole lives.

If she held off on sex because she dreaded it, then gave it up for love of her "first real boyfriend" at 22, then experiencing pain during sex would have confirmed her expectations, so no need to call a doctor, right? I think her behavior is entirely WNL for a lot of women. (I also think her use of "rape" as a way of describing bad consensual sex is demeaning to survivors of non-consensual sex, which is an entirely different and worse experience. If I were with her in the clinic I would tell her to check the "No" box -- none of this dithering about "diet caffeine free rape" bullshit.)

If the question is what box to check, the answer is clearly yes. She felt violated and was harmed, and it's a form about her health.

If the question is was she justified in feeling violated, the answer is also yes, if only for being awoke by him "thrusting I to her."

Does that make it rape for which he should be prosecuted? Probably not. Practically, proof would be hard, but even if it wasn't, he relied on her express assurances and/or lack of objection, and really should be able to do so in the context of a LTR.

A tragedy here is her inability to communicate and the pain she felt as a result of expecting him to read her mind. Part of becoming an adult is learning that lose that expectation.

And a further tragey is whatever led her to behave the way she did, putting up with shit no one should have to put up with.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally Posted by Fugee

Maybe I'm a wimp about pain but I can't imagine silently putting up with it.

Maybe he had a huge cock.

TM

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Please welcome Lisa Ramos.

http://www.lawtalkers.com/forums/sho...postcount=1300

http://www.lawtalkers.com/forums/sho...postcount=1301

http://www.lawtalkers.com/forums/sho...postcount=1302

http://www.lawtalkers.com/forums/sho...postcount=1303

TM

[Shape Shifter]

Originally Posted by ThurgreedMarshall

Maybe he had a huge cock.

TM

I thought that was a myth.

[Not Bob's Id]

Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield

In my years of being a sympathetic ear for many girlfriends, offering sage advice on all from lost loves, to whether or not kids are a good idea, to simply "getting the romance back," I have come to the conclusion some women simply aren't comfortable talking openly about sex. It's a tragic trap of neuroses and residual hang-ups from patriarchal rearing for so many.

Two points:

A. Is it me, or does "Patriarchal Rearing" sound like a sexual role playing activity?

2. Nicely done, Raouuuuuuul. Working the Woodford neat, hmm? Now if I could only refrain from reading your posts on the PB, I might find you amusing again.